Healing asks, “will you stop struggling? Are you open to enjoying life more, enduring life less?”
I’m moving to a new office. Again. It’s been a process over the last few years and, frankly, I’m pretty pooped. Find a new space, set it all up, try it out, pack it up, try again.
Sigh.
It’s not that the spaces I tried out were bad per say. They just weren’t my space. I’m looking for that juuuuust-right space that is not too hot, not too cold, and feels like home.
Which, ironically enough, is exactly where I’ve ended up. At home.
My new office space is in my barn. Okay, so it’s not quite there yet, but we’re busy as bees hustling and bustling to make ceilings and walls and carpet the floors. Not even done yet and I can just feel that “it’s the one.” This is what I’ve been seeking, this is the space that meets my list of “I-just-gotta-have-this-for-my-clients.”
We began this reconstruction process a month ago and it looks like it’ll take awhile yet. And, oh God, everything in me wants to push this along, drag its ass to the finish line already and get on with the next leg of the journey.
But… as I go out there, paint brush in hand and happy music playing on my phone, I find that The Process is asking to be honored. Seen. Allowed. Allowed to unfold, not forced into opening.
Hey… psssst. Slow down. Breathe. Don’t miss this magical moment, that in-between hour when your dream has shown itself but hasn’t yet manifested. This is a precious time! There’s something here for you to see, feel, grasp, receive… so that you can eventually embody Peace, Patience, Vision, Joy-In-The-Midst. Allow this experience!
a still small voice within… or maybe it’s the barn… or The Process
It’s exactly what I long to offer in this new space: Peace that surpasses understanding; Calm that settles bone-deep and manifests bigly, widely; Healing that is nothing short of miraculous. And I suppose this kind of frequency is deserving of honor, patience, safe space.
And so… while it feels as if we’re only making progress by millimeters, it is enough. And I feel blessed. Grateful.
This is a lot of personal healing, as one who makes lists for my lists and gets high off of crossing shit off and getting everything done by the end of the day. It’s like this Creating-The-Barn Process is offering to me an opportunity to slow down, breathe, trust, hold the vision while also letting go of the moment, the ache to always be doing, the need to accomplish quickly, efficiently, in perfection.
It’s a damn lot, dude.
But… I don’t want my list to obscure my vision. As a reminisce about this Holy Process, I want to remember how it felt to see both the barn and my soul unfold into Beauty. I want to recall how Honoring The Process felt in my bones so that I can share this story with future clients.
If you’re always racing to the next moment, what happens to the one you’re in?
Nanette Mathews
As the paint goes on, I am listening closely to the squoosh sound. I find myself literally watching the paint dry, imagining the group meditations, the mind-body coaching sessions, the sound bowl therapy treatments, the laughter, the tears, the dreams shared, the grief gathered and honored, the empowerment gained… and I know that I am honoring the NoLongerAndNotYet Space, so holy, awe-some, slow, grounded, opening.
And it is well with my soul.
If you are finding yourself in that “I am no longer but not yet” space, thank you for the company. Me too. Feels good to know I’m not alone on this journey. It’s sacred space, I tell ya. Sacred, sometimes lonely. Not easy, but surely part of the awakening, evolving. Can you feel me next to you, step at a time, reminding us of the Beauty in the Allowing? May I say, NoLongerButNotYet looks damn good on you, my fellow traveler, and here’s a hug.
Edgy, joyful, pondering…
Lisa ❤
Licensed Sound Therapist
Certified Mind-Body Coach
If you like these ponderings, please check out my 30-day journals. They’re just perfect for someone like you. 🙂 Downloadable pdfs on a variety of topics. Sure to encourage, inspire, motivate, and create meaningful ponderings. ❤
Writing Every Day Down 