Writing Every Day Down

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You’re Making A Difference

Yes.

I believe it does…

I create Sound Baths and Guided Meditations on YouTube and the viewership is minimal… this morning, I asked God, “should I continue? I don’t think I’m making much of a difference.”

The answer was a solid OH HELL YES! (Who knew that God swears?) 😉

Everything we do, whether there is an audience or not, creates a ripple out into the universe. All the good that you do, keep doing it. You ARE making a difference.

No matter where you are, who you’re with, no matter who notices your works… every little act of kindness DOES change the world. Please keep that shit up.

Love, Me.

And God.

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Are You Ready?

If you keep carrying the same old bricks, you’ll keep building the same old house.

Profound pondering, indeed… like reading the newspaper from two weeks ago to find out what’s going on in the world tomorrow… or checking the weather forecast from last week to figure out whether you need to carry an umbrella this afternoon.

Not helpful.

Like… bringing yesterday’s painful memories into today, creating an equally painful tomorrow.

Not helpful.

Like… ruminating about that childhood thing that happened and that person who wronged you and that situation that never should have occurred… again, again, again… filling up today and manifesting a tomorrow which doesn’t look any more healed, more peaceful, more abundant, more free.

Not helpful.

Time to let go of the old stories.

Time to create a new narrative.

Time to drop the bricks.

Time to build a new house.

If you’re intrigued and courageous, you can manifest a sovereign reality, free of bitterness and strife, ill health and pain… check out these journals and consider making an appointment for a consultation to form a plan of action.

Now THAT would be helpful, indeed.

To Your Freedom!

Lisa 🙂

P.S. Check out our journals and consider making an appointment for a consultation and get going on creating a pain-free life.

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Isn’t That Crazy?

In a world full of people, only some want to fly. Isn’t that crazy?

Alanis Morissette

Only some want to fly.

To risk seeing from the heights.

To chance making a fool of themselves.

Isn’t that crazy?

I want to fly.

I like trying new things.

I am not afraid of failing.

(Isn’t that crazy?)

I would rather try and fail.

I’d rather show up and crash.

I am not afraid of falling.

(Isn’t that crazy?)

What scares me more than anything is mediocrity, four walls.

Nightmares are made up of safety, never-trying, analysis-paralysis.

The worst that can happen is I’ve played it safe.

Stability is safe.

But flying, seeing Beyond the four walls…

now that’s crazy! it’s nuts!!

“Flying… but what if you die?”

What if?

What if always knowing, understanding, figuring it all out

Is death, the end of the row, no more adventure.

(Isn’t that crazy?)

I will show up, plug in, turn it up loud.

I will break out of this box.

I will fail before I stop sharing, caring, daring.

I will fall before I stop rising, flying.

I am living.

Flying.

Sometimes dying.

Always alive.

Isn’t that crazy?

We’re never gonna survive… unless we get a little crazy.

Alanis Morissette

We’re on a journey of embodying Unity Consciousness... so the connection between mind and body is where it’s at! Here’s a song to allow the CRAZY in you (that is you!) to surface — dance, breathe deeply, swing those arms, stomp those legs… and another one because what’s better than one song? TWO. Please, please, please… allow your crazy to rise. Allow yourself to fly. Be your shiny self. Enjoy!

Let’s go crazy… let’s get nuts.

Prince

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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Just Do It

Just do it.

Nike said it well… just do it.

Do it afraid.
Do it without knowing the details.
Do it even if only one person shows up.

Just do it.

I am offering mind-body classes in my new space. Well, I’m contemplating offering classes… truth is, I’ve been pondering and preparing but haven’t yet put myself out there.

Why?

Fear.
Don’t know the details.
Not sure anyone is going to show up.

But I’ve been here before. This isn’t my first rodeo, baby. I’ve opened my doors three other times without knowing the details and unsure as to whether anyone was going to show up. I did it afraid. I showed up and that’s what counted.

I showed up!

So, here I am again. For a fourth time, I am opening my doors to something new, something unknown… but something really darn exciting too.

All that shortness of breath, trouble sleeping, butterflies in the tummy… can be signs of fear but also signs of sheer anticipation!

No need to wait until I’m not afraid, have all the details, and know exactly who’s showing up… I’m plunging in, both feet and over my head. Why not? What’s life for if not for the wildness of the adventure?!

What will you do with this one wild and precious life?

Mary Oliver

I think, dear Life, I will live you to the marrow. I will experience you when I’m afraid and experience you when I’m unsure and experience you when I’m trembling. I will live you here and I will live you there… I will open my heart and arms and door and I will just do it.

Yes, I will just do it.

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We’re on a journey of embodying Divine Consciousness... so the connection between mind and body is where it’s at! I have played this song only about a hundred times in the past month… it fires me up and reminds me that “I am the one I’ve been waiting for!” Get up, dance, shake it off, welcome it in. But for the love of all that’s courageous and worthy, JUST DO IT.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

If you like these contemplations, please check out my 30-day journals. They’re just perfect for someone like you. 🙂 Downloadable PDFs on a variety of topics. Sure to encourage, inspire, motivate, and create meaningful ponderings. ❤
Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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Loving What Is

I am a lover of what is, not because I am a spiritual person, but because it hurts to argue with reality.

Byron Katie

I have been on a journey of LETTING GO. Surrendering to what is rather than trying to manipulate and maneuver to what would be more comfortable for me.

Truth is out.

My serenity has been contingent upon my comfort.

But no more.

I have officially dropped comfort as my aim and fallen nestea-plunge-style into the arms of The Comforter. It’s there, within me and all around me, that Still Small Voice of Love. Slowing down has helped me to hear It.

Be still and know I Am God.

Holy Spirit

The Voice didn’t start talking once I stopped moving, managing, making-it-happen… nah. That Voice has been whispering all along but I couldn’t hear It over the din of the chaos called my daily planner, my expectations, my narrow vision, my overloaded list of to-do’s.

It’s been so much to unwind! Lots to unlearn and relearn.

We can know that reality is good just as it is, because when we argue with it, we experience tension and frustration. We don’t feel natural or balanced. When we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, fluid, kind, and fearless.

Byron Katie

But, oh, the adventure… this experience of slowing down is rockin’ my world. Everything is slower now… my days, my running speed, my thoughts. I mean, I even breathe more slowly now. I think before I speak because there’s space between my words… this is radical, baby. Absolutely deeply freakin’ radical.

Sometimes it’s quiet in my head and in my whole body for hours at a time. HOURS.

There is no try.

Flow.

Ease.

Which doesn’t mean that my life is dull or easy. Same goofball stuff is unpacking but I am not reacting. Sure, sometimes life changes but sometimes it’s just ME that has changed. The PEACE is not something “out there” – it’s ME. I’m the Peace. I’m the Breath. I’m the Calm in the Midst of the Storm. I’m the Quiet in the Chaos.

What if WHAT IS isn’t wrong?

What if WHAT IS doesn’t need fixing?

What if WHAT IS is “only” just super uncomfortable?

What if WHAT IS is exactly how it’s supposed to be… for our biggest evolution, our grandest awakening, our deepest expansion of Christ Consciousness?

What if WHAT IS is perfectly perfect in all its messiness… enabling us to embody Oneness, Unity Consciousness, our Divinity?

What if WHAT IS is helping us wake the heck up out of our slumber, our numbness, our illusion?!?!?!

What if WHAT IS is the way – and the onus is upon us to not fix, formulate, or fantasize… but to buckle up, press play, and enjoy the ride?!

Wouldn’t that be an adventure worth leaning into….

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We’re on a journey of embodying Unity Consciousness... so the connection between mind and body is where it’s at! Here’s a song you can get up and dance to… move your body, breathe deeply, enjoy! Mind-body connection to awaken to Truth that you are God-spark. Waking up. Remembering. Embodying Itself.

Buckle up. Press play. It’s time to ride!

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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Contemplation Is A Hammer…

Contemplation is life itself, fully awake, fully active, and fully aware that it is alive. It is spiritual wonder. It is spontaneous awe at the sacredness of life, of being. It is gratitude for life, for awareness, and for being. It is a vivid realization of the fact that life and being in us proceed from an invisible, transcendent, and infinitely abundant Source.

Thomas Merton

Water droplets.

Falling.

In the kitchen sink.

Clock.

Ticking.

Hanging on the bathroom wall.

Peepers.

Chirping.

Under Tree.

Hammers.

Banging.

Neighbor is getting a new roof.

Tomatoes.

Smell like earth.

Just picked this morning, now in bowl on counter.

Fresh coffee grounds.

Dry, whisked in grinder, aromatic.

Ready for tomorrow’s breakfast.

Bees.

Buzzing, so busy.

Finding their way into the window frame.

(Tell Husband!)

Brownies.

Baking in oven.

Already can’t wait for dinner’s dessert!

Keys.

Clicking.

My fingers speaking with letters, forming words.

This sound, that odor, this feeling.

Moments at a time.

I have slowed down.

Way down.

Stillness.

Very often, so quiet.

My mind quiets too.

As I allow myself to listen, to sniff, to feel.

To contemplate.

Contemplation isn’t happening in my mind.

It’s where I go when I stay, when I am still, when I allow myself to land in my body.

Contemplation isn’t an action.

It’s what happens when I allow, surrender, let go, breathe.

More hammering.

More roofing.

Buzzing.

Coffee.

Chocolate.

Simplicity.

Stillness.

Freedom.

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We’re on a journey of embodying Unity Consciousness... so the connection between mind and body is where it’s at! This is one of my favorite songs to get up off my butt and DANCE! Move your body… breathe… laugh… enjoy-your-life. Peace, Friend. xxx

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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Free Falling

We’re in a freefall into future. We don’t know where we’re going. Things are changing so fast, and always when you’re going through a long tunnel, anxiety comes along.

Joseph Campbell

Freefall.

Change.

Long tunnel.

Anxiety.

Check, check, check, and check… Yes. This is where I’ve found myself. Technically, I’ve been falling without a parachute for nearly five years. Until about a year ago, I fought it. Kicking, screaming, trying to figure it all out, control it.

Which only exhausted me… but did finally – finally – help me to see that figuring it out, trying to control it, was futile. Tired me to the bone, right down into my soul.

And so, I stopped. I ceased fighting it and allowed the fall, leaned into the unknown. Opened wide my arms, my heart, and my mouth: BRING IT ON! If this is hell, then I want in – ALL IN – on the adventure! If I’m here, it’s for the fullness of the whole damn experience. HERE I AM!

And all you have to do to transform your hell into a paradise is to turn your fall into a voluntary act. It’s a very interesting shift of perspective and that’s all it is… joyful participation in the sorrows and everything changes.

Joseph Campbell

It was shortly after this that I had my “naked dream.” Ya know, one of those I-don’t-have-a-stitch-on-and-everyone-can-see-me… and, well hell with it, I embraced the nakedness. Serving food sans even an apron, naked as the day I was born, and I felt… I FELT FREE.

What could cause me fear now? I’ve faced being seen in all my naked glory and I stood there, tall and proud (well, truthfully not tall since I’m just over five feet but you’re hearing me) and breathing deeply and oh-my-god who knew freedom could feel this FREE? Who knew I could feel this POWERFUL?

Who knew I could feel this compassionate, tender, gentle, humorous, insightful, hopeful? Who knew nakedness/authenticity/integrity/embracing my Self could open up the Deep in me?

I am free falling into my Self… into the Depths of ME.

I had faced my fears, held my traumas as holy messengers, allowed for the recalibration of my body-mind complex, and created wide open space for the endless possibilities of Unconditional Love to bubble up from within me (where they’d always been, just hidden behind door number one (fear of rejection) and door number two (fear of abandonment) and door number three (fear of being misunderstood, humiliated, gossiped about.)

Doors wide open, rooms cleaned out, naked dream integrated… check, check, and check.

The funny thing is… I still don’t know what my future holds, how I’ll spend my days, who’ll be my friends, where I’ll serve (although I’m quite sure I will be clad and maybe even aproned!) But I’m not afraid. I’m not triggered by this unknown.

Today, now, I’m free falling.

Falling.

Free.

The bad news is you’re free falling out of the sky with no parachute. The good news is there is no ground.

Chogyam Trumpa

Free falling.

No parachute.

No ground.

Check, check, and check… FREEDOM!

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Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of surrendering to the free fall:

Nature beckons. Mother Gaia is at her best when she’s holding you. Lay upon the grass, under a tree, arms spread wide side to side. Make an angel of your arms and legs, swooshing them in-out. Breathe deeply through your nose. Open wide your mouth and laugh your exhale. Now roll over, face down into the grass and imagine yourself way up in the sky. Hey, look at you tumbling safely through the clouds! You’re flying, you’re free falling… with no ground. Imagine what the earth looks like from so far up up up… keep laughing. There’s only blue sky and adventures on your horizon. Life is a free fall indeed. Peace be with you, Dear Soul.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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The Skirt

The fear of rejection is rooted in a deep desire to belong.

Promised Daughter I would tailor a skirt that she found at a thrift shop. Super cute skirt, too big and the elastic was shot.

I quickly agreed, “yes, I’d be happy to create a skirt that fits for you!” Just as quickly, I knew I had no idea how to do that.

Onward and upward… I pulled apart seams, inserted an invisible zipper, trimmed loose threads… pulled out the zipper which refused to be invisible, sewed together seams, and trimmed loose threads… well, hey, three times the charm and off to the races we go again… trimming, pulled, sewing…

Crying. Yep, crying.

I could not get that damn zipper to tuck into the seam and my sewing machine started freezing on me. And then it happened. I became terrified.

Terrified.

Which made me even more terrified… because, like, uhm, it’s a zipper, Lis. What are you falling so far apart for? Why this terror and why not a shrug and a “hey, I tried here’s your skirt back and the zipper and maybe you can figure it out I gave it my best shot.”

The thought – the mere thought – of telling Daughter that I couldn’t figure out how to tailor her skirt freaked me out. Troubled breathing; aching shoulders; roiling tummy. I felt on the edge of… of what, Lis? What is causing you such physical reaction to a mundane non-issue?

It’s a skirt, Lis.

A. Skirt.

I can’t fail! I cannot NOT succeed! My body was screaming, my mind was numb, my heart was squeezed… Lis, it’s a damn skirt. And a cheap one at that. WTF?!

FEAR. I was scared into anxiety about letting Daughter down, about disappointing her. What would she think of me? Might she surmise that I don’t love her? Would she be heartbroken?

WOULD SHE REJECT ME?!

Getting nowhere fast with the skirt, I chose to sit with this reaction, these thoughts, for awhile under Tree. Then sat on Porch for a bit as well… I got quiet. I got curious. I listened.

And realized that I wasn’t scared that Daughter would be disappointed in me. I was disappointed in me. I surmised that my actions would make me unlovable. I saw in that moment that I connected fulfilling her request with feeling like I was needed – that by my producing a wearable skirt for her, I kept my place as “necessary” in her life. Without this skirt, I could very well be discarded!

Big realization: I had a subconscious-now-conscious thought/story that if I let someone down, I am unlovable, toss-able, unworthy. Defective. Have skirt, accepted. Sans skirt, rejected. Sheesh.

What to do now? I stayed. Stayed with the thought, letting it unpack. Stayed with the feelings, let them be felt. Deeply, safely felt.

More than a pain in my day, this skirt was revealing my pain-body (as Eckhardt Tolle calls it.) For years and a lifetime, I had been holding my breath, people pleasing for sheer terror that to do anything less than what anyone-everyone asked was to remain invisible.

Like when I was a kid.

Fear of rejection is a persistent and irrational fear of being excluded.

Except when it IS rational. Because you WERE excluded. Tossed aside. Invisible.

The issue is when we bring yesterday’s news – heartaches and stories – into today’s happenings and relationships. Taints everything. Creates more of the same. Seeing through yesterday’s unhealed parts perpetuates the pain.

The pain accrued was not my doing nor my fault… and somewhere I may very likely have chosen it, but that’s a thread for another day… but it IS my responsibility to heal, re-parent, rewire, recalibrate.

So, Lis, do you want to continue to partner with “I gotta say YES and make sure everyone around me is always pleased with me” or would you prefer to be FREE?

I’ll take freedom, please, with a side of sweet potato fries.

And so… I am reminding myself that I AM God awakening to Itself; I AM Spirit experiencing humanity; I AM The All and so can never be “outside” or excluded. Today, I experienced terror in the form of fear of rejection based on a belief that I’d created a long time ago because of the behaviors of others. But I also experienced allowing the terror to bubble up, to be received, allowed, embraced, heard, rocked, made okay, and loved… at which time I experienced fear alchemizing, integrating, and Love and True Identity expanding within me.

And fourth time’s the charm. I got the skirt finished.

It was a big energy day indeed.

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Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of ALLOWING what is happening to unpack its message:

Stay with the breath. This is mindfulness practice – and practice it is and takes! Every time you find yourself anywhere but “right here, right now”, as soon as you become aware that that’s what you’re doing… you’re not doing it anymore. Voila! Stay. Stay with the breath. This means always keeping a bit of attention on your breath, the flow of air in and out of the nose, which is the first step to becoming more consistently aware of whether you are reacting or responding and how this very moment is unpacking to you. So often, we are only recreating events based on our thoughts rather than staying, being still within, and experiencing the very moment with fresh eyes, open hearts, and NO AGENDAS, expectations, needs. Stay with the breath. Practice doing this for five minutes… ten, fifteen, twenty minutes… until it is how you approach and partner with every single second. Peace be with you, Dear Curious-Compassionate-Courageous Soul. Peace.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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Simplicity

What if life was more simple than we make it out to be?

Husband and I were talking this morning over coffee. We start our day walking the Gia FurButt The-WonderDog-Extraordinaire (she added that last word… no self-esteem issues there!) and then settling in for a quiet breakfast. He reads the paper, I the latest spiritual book. I also write lists and journal. Most often, we share ponderings about the latest local happenings (that’s him) and the deep existential angst of being human (aaaand that’s me.) We meet somewhere in all of it.

This morning, we found ourselves at the same street corner of “what the hell is going on in the world and maybe it’s a whole lot more simple than we’re making it!” Shaking his head, Husband wondered if all these latest rules and regs are truly necessary… and I, shaking my fist, wondered if all this info is where I find God.

We’ve concluded a solid NO to both queries… for the love of God, let people grow flowers on the other side of the sidewalk (seriously!) and do what you can to live in Peace in your own heart, for the love of people, who are God – and you’ll find them planting flowers all sortsa places, even on the forbidden other side of the walkway. God is there, God is here, God is them, God is me and you.

Stay low, stay quiet, keep it simple, don’t expect too much, enjoy what you have.

Dean Koontz (Husband’s favorite author)

Newspaper recycled, books closed, coffee cups emptied… we sighed, gave thanks for our simple life, sometimes busy, often loud, usually expensive with FiveBeautifulSouls, but always an adventure, unpredictable, full of hugs, disagreements, laughter, and food.

Speaking of simple and food… picked up this potato and onion holder at a garage sale last weekend. Have wanted one for years and happened upon it at an estate sale – five bucks! – and it looks great in the corner of the sunroom. Reminds me of “the old days” when Nana kept the veggies in the cellar.

And it was okay to plant flowers past the sidewalk and the search for God was a less complicated quest…

Simpler. Perhaps.

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Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of SIMPLICITY:

Leave the phone in the car or in the house… head outside, sit in the grass or the sand. Shoes off and toes wiggled deeply into Mother Earth. Become aware of your breath. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Just recognize this amazing practice of breathing. Slow down your breath. Four counts in, hold for seven counts, eight counts release, feel your shoulders relax, your spine straighten, your belly soften. Stay here, doing this most simple – SIMPLE – exercise for at least a half hour. Enjoy this now moment. As Ram Dass says, BE HERE NOW. Maybe even lie back, cloud-ponder, bring arms out to sides, making “snow angels” sans the snow… remember being a kid? Go there. Bring that simplicity back with you… and believe that one complicated aspect of your life is unwinding itself, straightening out, softening up… and now, as we close, breathe in Peace and breathe out Gratitude. Simplicity brings ease… enjoy.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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Peace Out, I’m Cleaning!

Clean your space, clear your mind.

I have been very busy cleaning the past few weeks. I mean, the nooks and crannies. I mean, five to six hours daily. For weeks!

Who knew I had this much shit? This much dust and disorganization?

Who knew something as simple as going room to room, organizing and dusting, moving around furniture and getting rid of extraneous items would be so cleansing to my soul!?

Hours and numerous buckets of soapy water later, I feel more peaceful. Grounded. Calm.

Note to self: whenever you’re feeling a little out of control, scattered, tattered, weary… don the yellow gloves, fill up the bucket, scrub away the layer of dust. Organize drawers – except the junk drawer because who ever does that? – and make a pile for the Salvation Army. Purge your environment of the extra, the outdated, the no longer necessary…

And then, oh dear Lisa, then… you can do the same with your mind. Purge that racing, busy pondering noggin of the extra, the outdated, and the no longer necessary.

Out of clutter, find simplicity; from discord, harmony; in the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.

Albert Einstein

Indeed. And now, to sit on my porch, listen to the birds and watch the squirrels… aaaahhhhh, cleanliness and simplicity…

Who knew Peace wore yellow gloves and carried a bucket?

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Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of Peace:

Pick one room. Don “yellow gloves” and fill up a bucket with soapy water. Start by going through any drawers or cupboards or shelves. Hold each item to your heart. Do you still need it? If yes, keep it. If no, start the Salvation Army pile. Next, wash down the walls and any furniture. Vacuum, wash floors, feng shui the energies in the space. Are the pictures hanging bringing your joy? Keep them. No? Sally pile. Bring in fresh flowers, dab cotton balls with essential oil and tuck them in drawers. Open windows, bring in the fresh air. Play classical music or joy-filled tunes to bring in a frequency of lightheartedness. It’s all about the energies so clear out the old and welcome in the new! Lastly, enjoy your new space. Pour yourself a lemonade or a beer and sit in your new digs, flowing with upbeat, healthy vibration. Cheers!

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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“Absence”

Where there is deep grief, there is great love.

Daughter created a deeply moving set of paintings borne of her lost love, Esther. A longtime fur-friend, Esther was very much a part of our family.

Fourteen years. Her passing wasn’t a surprise yet we were shocked, shook to the core that she was actually gone. Still here, her energies wandering the apartment and awaiting Alisia’s return from work or the gym, but still gone.

It’s been a lot. Too much, really. Grief is a really big deal.

Grief is a great rite of passage. It is a hero’s journey of courage, of sacred battles, sorrow, love, joy, and loss.

An artist, Alisia tapped into and allowed Grief its visit, its “knock on the door and welcome me in forever.” She experienced Grief via her paintings, illustrating her chasm of loss and sadness. Losing a best friend is among the hardest experiences. It’s something we can all relate to, if not a friend then a parent or a partner, child or dream.

Grief is universal. Which doesn’t make it one bit easier to feel, to be with, to abide in. Not. One. Bit.

Through the darkness of grief, we can see the light of love which transcends death.

I think we’re entering a season in the Collective Consciousness in which we allow Grief to be honored, allowed its place at the table, its voice in the discussion. No more pressing the mute button, going into airplane mode, shoving it to the back corner of the basement.

Grief has something Divine to share with us. Perhaps It is reminding us that Love and Loss are two sides of the same coin, and that one isn’t good and the other bad; one to be saught and the other to be avoided. Both can be beautifully horrible and horribly beautiful… but surely, received, embraced, seen for the Raw Real that It is… oh, the authenticity, vulnerability, messiness of Grief.

Daughter finally found herself ready to open her heart to another fur-friend. We welcomed Hudson, weirdly wonderful into our wonderfully weird family. We’re all adjusting. He’ll never be Esther, but he will be Hudson – and this is enough. Esther remains in our hearts, and occasionally we think we glimpse her at the top of the stairs.

It’s been a lot. Some days, still too much. But this is the way it is when we risk loving. It’s a brave act indeed to spread wide open our hearts to dream and laugh and argue and entangle energies and make memories and ponder futures… risky indeed.

To all the courageous souls, daring to dream and love and lose and grieve forever, I thank you. Thank you for showing up, for being brave knowing the price of Love is Grief, and for loving anyway.

If loving is holy, grieving may be the holiest act of all.

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of allowing yourself to be present with Grief:

Find a comfortable place, a most safe and secure place, a sanctuary if you can. Give yourself a half hour in which to breathe, and do nothing but BE. Be. Just be, and just breathe… whatever emotions and memories arise, hug them. Hug the you that is experiencing them. No need to analyze nor make them make sense. Grief is not logical and needs no interpretation. It wants only your full attention and loving embrace. Lean in to whatever arises, even the anger or regret. Everything that shows up is perfectly perfect. After you’ve spent time here, know that you can visit any time for the rest of your life. There’s no time limit, no deadline to get done with your grieving… Grief is too precious to rush… Peace be with you, dear Courageous Lover.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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The Little-Big Things

Enjoy the little things for one day you will look back and realize they were the big things.

Husband saw a small corner table along the road, put out for the trash collector. Knowing me well, Husband retrieved the table.

I love free. Free stuff. Stuff that’s free. I love free stuff.

This table fits perfectly on the porch, aside the rockers. Planter on top, still room for two glasses of lemonade… or beer.

It’s a simple addition to the porch, but one which brings me joy. Every time I water the plants or sit for a sip of lemonade… or beer, this table says, “hey, thanks for saving my unwanted butt and don’t I look like a princess in the corner here?”

Yes, dear Small Corner Table, you do. You really do. Now, hand me my drink and let’s watch the birds and the squirrels…

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of embodying noticing “the little things which are really big things”:

Sit quietly, apps closed, phone muted. Close your eyes and take three “cleansing” breaths. (Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, and release gently for as long as you can. Do this three times. This centers your attention and pulls your energies down into your body.) Now, open your eyes and look around you as if seeing everything for the very first time. Simple but eye-openings and heart-softening. How many “little things” can you see? Enjoy!

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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Friday Tune-Up!

Here’s your Friday tune, Mammy…

You can know a lot about a soul just by listening to their song list on Spotify… every Friday, FourthSon sends me a “It’s Friday!” song. Often, I’ll reciprocate.

Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without.

Confucious

I look forward to this exchange which I must admit feels mystifyingly intimate. To know what turns on another’s soul, what lights them up, what they would spend their precious time listening to… well, it’s a damn personal peek.

FourthSon is a strong personality. Always has been. He’s rock solid in his views and energies, such a safe space for others to be messy and wondering-wandering on their journeys. He is not easily deterred nor discouraged, ClarityAndPurpose seems to be his right hand helper… though he is a big-time napper on the weekends so maybe it’s just that he’s well rested. 😉

After silence, that which comes closest to expressing the inexpressible is music.

Aldous Huxley

FourthSon has been out on his own for years now… and I long to continue to know him better, more deeply. Days will pass without a text and I miss him in parts of my heart I didn’t even know existed! And so, with every Friday’s text, I rejoice… with each song he sends, I have been gifted a glimpse into what makes him tick. They’re more than songs to me… they’re pieces of him: his heart, his soul, his passion, his fire and zest for life itself and his vision for the possibilities of Love and Peace and Harmony in his idea of the world.

Fridays are the best, dude.

Is he aware that I inhale his every word? every text? every little sharing of his world? Probably not. He will, once he has children. Then he’ll get it… that our little Friday song ritual has been like air to me, water for this parched Mammy who misses her FiveBeautifulSouls every second of every day.

Music is the language of the spirit.

Kahlil Gibran

And so, today, it’s Cage The Elephant… a group he touts “can do no wrong.” Oh, I get this, I really do. FourthSon, birthed through me and on loan to me from God, you have been among my biggest teachers, thought-provokers, and fellow lyrics-lovers. Sweet child of mine, you can truly do no wrong in my eyes…

Today, in this very moment, I am full. Grateful.

Ear buds in, dancing shoes on… ’cause, Mammy, it’s Friday!

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of experiencing JOY:

Right now, this very second, toss your ear buds in, don your dancing sneaks – or barefoot works – find a song and DANCE… dance like the whole damn world is watching and cheering you on and everyone’s life gets better and better when you swing your arms and sway your hips… and, awesomer still, send this song to a one of your kids, a parent, partner, or friend…. and peace be with you, with us all. ❤

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

Hey, I have a YouTube channel on which I offer guided meditations, sound baths, and various ponderings… feel free to check it out!

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If I’d Only Known…

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Robert Brault

Yesterday, I reached into the freezer for a few more leftover Christmas cookies, oh those marvelous delicious wonderful morsels!

There were none left. Not one.

Not. One. Cookie.

Had I known that last week, when I reached in and snagged a few cookies out of the bag, that these would be my last cookies of Christmas 2023, I would have savored them. I would have closed my eyes and focused on the taste of the oats, those little chocolate pieces, and oh the bits of pecan… if I’d only known!

As a contemplative sort, I have marinated in the deep end of these waters. How can I best approach my today, having experienced the disappointment of no more cookies? My heart, be still, oh an opportunity to savor the last cookie of the season missed!

Now that I know better, I’ll do better.

And so, I have found my energies calibrated even more intensely to GRATITUDE for every cookie. Every one! Each one is “the last” and wildly deserving of all my attention, savoring, and thanks.

Truly, each moment warrants such radical abandon to it… for perhaps it may be “my last” and I will have wished that I’d treated it with the dignity, attention, and interest that “a last moment” invites?!

Express gratitude for the greatness of all small things.

Richie Norton

Small things, big things… who’s to say which is which? And so, I’ll just be mindful to be demonstrative for it all. Bases covered. 😉

And next Christmas, I’m making double batches. Maybe even triple.

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of cultivating an energy of APPRECIATION:

Just for this next sixty seconds, stop everything. Notice your breath. Notice your nose. Notice the hairs in your nose. Notice the flow of the air into your throat, down into your lungs, and further into your belly. Envision that air as a gold mist…. notice again your breath, inhaling the gold mist… filling your body with the gold mist… and exhaling the gold mist into your auric field and out into your world. What a miracle your life is! You are a miracle! Enjoy every moment, friend. Peace be with you.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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The Birthday Card

We don’t see the world the way it is. We see the world the way we are.

The other day, my dad turned 82. He’s been both my biggest blessing and my deepest pain. I find that this is the way things go… if we would be so brave as to look Fear right in the face, we would see Freedom.

In every fear, the seed of freedom awaits. Even fear is an aspect of God. When I ceased demonizing our relationship, dad and me, a most beautiful and unique flower began to bloom in our garden.

There were years that I resented sending a card, knowing that my heart still ached for an apology or at the very least an explanation or acknowledgement. Nod your head in my general direction, please Dad! See me, see me, see me!

But I’ve been on the journey of healing me… the events from my childhood were not “my fault” and my feelings are not bad, but the actions I take now and the healing are all mine… all mine to own, stand in, allow, breathe into and through… and transmute all that lead into gold, all that shit into fertile soil for Flower to root into… turn that caterpillar into a butterfly…

and all that transformation stuff…

I sent the card, not because he’s kind, but because I’m kind.

Lately, I understand more that life is a series of choices… and we have the opportunity to make them borne of our own energies, of actions taken rather than reactions taking over. It was a most powerful truth indeed to realize that I hold all the power to make my choices. I do not have to wait for the outside world, circumstances or people, to dictate my path. I choose. As consciously as I currently operate, I make my way.

The world squeezes us… and we get to see what we’re really made of.

To see the other as an extension of my-Self has been helpful in my choice-making. I see the flawed human being, muddling around in the dark, reacting out of pain, unresolved ache, body-held trauma… and I have deep compassion for us all.

Living from Peace – my true identity – is powerful indeed.

This being human thing ain’t for the faint of heart… it’s a lot. Really. A. Friggin’. Lot.

I am remembering to respond from Presence… this has been a journey.

I love having my Dad in my life because he has helped me gauge my compassion, how “awakened to Love” that I am. My heart has always been slayed wide open in our relationship – which is how I believe he and I planned it before we incarnated this time around – and he has been among my best reminders, awakeners, healers.

Happy birthday to you, Dad. Peace be with you, with me, with us, and with us all.

**************************************************************************************************************

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of remembering the aspect of God which is you that is Peace:

Just for one minute, place both of your hands over your heart. Breathe. Feel the air come miraculously into your nostrils, through your throat, down into your belly, and back out your mouth. What a miracle breathing is! You’re a miracle! If you’re able, picture someone in your life right now who you are struggling with… in your imagination, see them as a young child, maybe two years old. See their innocence, their wonder, their playfulness, their simplicity… before life began to bruise them, batter their heart, create in them a hardness. Hold onto this image and every time you see them or think of them from now on, remember this picture… and be on the journey of awakening to Compassion, Understanding, and Patience. (Have I told you lately that you’re a miracle, an absolute shiny, sensational ray of the Divine. Thank you for being here, among us on earth at this time.)

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach
If you like these contemplations, please check out my 30-day journals. They’re just perfect for someone like you. 🙂 Downloadable PDFs on a variety of topics. Sure to encourage, inspire, motivate, and create meaningful ponderings. ❤

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Be Still… or else!

Stay inside today, Mama….
G-Butt, on this windy, rainy day

I am a list maker. I make lists. I make lists of my lists. Organized and precise, I can dream wilder and wider when I know that the bathroom is getting cleaned on Thursday, the laundry on Saturday, shopping on Tuesday… go ahead, Lis, dream on! It’s all getting done in due course.

I love to dream. Oh, sweet fantasy, you welcome me and I you!
me, head in the clouds with feet on the ground

All five of my BeautifulSouls children have moved out and are rocking it big time in their own lives… and I recently retired from owning a full-time business… and so the weirdest damn thing ever has been happening… there are days when I have nothing to do. No list to write. Nothing to cross off.

This has the potential to cause me great angst. Or at least long pause…

My God, I must have a list… or else!

Or else? Or else what?
me, lately… bravely, hands on hips

G-Butt AKA Gia FurButt AKA Gia has been a great teacher regarding list-making and guilt-shame-fear reaction. She lives inside this very moment, outside of time altogether… and, as such, has been unpacking to me the divine perspective that merely existing is holy, that listening to the wind and watching the rain from the big front window in the living room is a perfectly perfect and worthy way to pass the day… that being curious about the birds snagging worms and watching the clouds poof by is a beautiful devotion in and of itself… and that some days and some seasons are less busy, less preoccupied, more open, more uncharted than others… taking note of the simple things is not a waste of time after all… there’s a time for full and a time for empty, a time for joy and a time for grief, a time for knowing and a time for waiting…

(And there’s peanut butter… but she tangents….)

Breathe. Here. Now. Be led… be led by that small, quiet voice within… whose name is Love… I AM… Presence… gracious, kind, gentle… with a bigger vision of Reality and a smaller mission of purpose (slow down, experience fully, simplify!)

It’s been an uncomfortable space to find myself in, if I’m being honest. I wish I could beat my chest and shout, “This feels amaaaazing!” but, truth is, I feel out of sync with life, with the world, my friends, even my family. I look around lately and I just don’t fit in anywhere…

Today, I am.
me, with no list and no agenda… which is really freaking stretching me

I am realizing that much of my identity and feeling of importance/relevance has been in ACCOMPLISHMENT and busy-ness… and as this pares itself down to “serving as God leads,” I find myself anxious that I’m missing something or missing out on doing-creating-making…

My whole being has been in such a habit of GO, DO, GET SHIT DONE, PRODUCE… that allowing this quiet, still space may be one of my biggest challenges to date… frankly, I’m scared to death that I should be doing something or else…

Dammit, there’s that “or else” thing again…

and yet, I know that this is an illusion. I can’t miss my purpose because I am IN my purpose already. Today, my purpose may look like stillness; tomorrow, counseling. And not one is more holy than the other.

Jesus hung with the crowds and his peeps, performing feats and orating parables… and spent just as much time alone, quiet and contemplative.

There’s a time for doing and a time for being… and both are holy.
me, encouraging my own damn self and it’s complicated some days 😉

Fortunately, there’s the G-Butt… and she’s a good reminder and great company. And so in this very moment, all is well. With a list and without, I am accomplishing a full life just by existing. Being still. Peace-full. In gratitude, awe, wonder…

listening to the wind… sharing peanut butter by the spoonful… thankful.

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of being still:

Set aside fifteen minutes. Find a comfortable spot to rest, to be quiet, to be uninterrupted. We will be practicing the art of contemplation. Find a word to focus on – maybe PEACE or STILLNESS or GRATITUDE – and allow that word to sit in your mind like an ice cube or a snowball… then imagine the sun shining down upon your head and melting the cube/ball and it dripping its way down into your heart where it moistens any dry, thirsty parts of you… and maybe you can realllllly be still and allow your physical body to speak to you. Where does your body sense this word finding its place within you? As you learn to EMBODY the knowledge you’re gleaning, your reality will shift. (This practice can be done with or without peanut butter.) 😉

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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Unplug Me, Please

Almost everything will work if you unplug it for a few minutes, then plug it back in.
Husband

Keeping life simple. This is not my strongest trait but it is my Siddhi (Dharmic gift to The Collective) so it’s in me somewhere, smooshed between all my books on healing and notes on meditation, squashed among all my journals. But seriously… I have been on a journey of allowing SIMPLICITY to flourish in my life.

Simplicity: easy, straightforward, plain, clear.

Today, I have been intentional to stay in the moment because I do want to experience Peace. I know it is my destiny to say, “I live a life of simplicity. I cultivate a daily practice of clarity, ease, letting go of complexity, anxiety, competition… and this feels so good in my body. Peace-full. Dis-ease free. Whole and healthy. Quiet.”

My Gigi FurButt is a pro at this… nothing riles her up. No questions bang around in the deep end, keeping her up at night. She lives in the moment, full of joy and wonder and gratitude. At least, I’m assuming that wagging tail is a great big “thank you, mama!”

Receiving whatever the moment is offering, she carries an energy of curiosity, compassion – she is very patient with me and on my crying days, won’t leave my side – and, yes, simplicity.

Same dog food every day. Same schedule day in and day out. Few surprises. Seldom any visitors. We trek the same three paths for our poopy-peepee walks.

Nary a complaint from her. With an eagerness and a very uncomplicated countenance, she eases us into the next moment, the next step along the road, keeping her ears open for the birds’ songs or Bunbun’s puffy tail to tease her over by TallTree.

She’s teaching me a lot.

Stay. In. This. Moment.
Unplug.
Go belly-up on the couch and take a quick snooze.
Look out the window at the squirrels. They’re fascinating and bark-worthy!
Eat peanut butter. Lots and lots of peanut butter makes the belly happy.

Relax. It’s only a game.
Thich Nhat Hanh

When I first began this intentional SIMPLICITY journey, my body would rage against my slower pace, my quietness, my sitting on the couch (without even a book in hand!) No phone, no music playing, no distractions…

My mind would whisper, “how can I only be sitting here? only breathing, only contemplating a poem, only bringing awareness to my feelings, chakras, organs, only praying?” The anxiety was deep and wide… the ONLY was heavy in my body.

Only: as little as, sole, solitary, unique.

But… with practice and time, patience and self compassion, I am learning. I am allowing. And today, I have manifested a very ONLY day… quiet, solitary, slow, unique indeed. Simple.

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.
Lao Tzu

I too am a part of nature and so it’s good for me to slow down, settle in, unplug… and later, or maybe not til tomorrow, I’ll plug back in.

Today has been Gia-approved. Me-approved too.

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of cultivating simplicity:

Find a comfortable place to sit or lie down. Breathe deeply through your nose and out your mouth three times. Feel the breath enter through your nostrils and tickle your nose-hairs. Can you feel the breath finds its way down into your belly? Allow your belly to fill up like a balloon. Notice if there is any tension in your body as your hold the breath… and then allow that tension to be released as you exhale fully. Hold onto this word deeply into your heart: simplify.

Perhaps you would consider journaling about what SIMPLICITY and living a more simple life looks like for you. What one thing can you start to do today that would open up your heart and allow simplicity to flow? What one thing are you hanging onto that you can let go of to SIMPLIFY your energies and your daily life?

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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Howling Out The Pain

Trauma is not what happens to us but what we hold inside in the absence of an empathic witness.
Peter Levine

As a Collective Consciousness, I think that we are in the throes of understanding that talking about our pain is not sufficient for healing. We must also feel into it, at the physical body place, and allow another to hold sacred space for us in the midst of the experience.

An empathic witness is one who compassionately sits with you while you are allowing your body, your mind, and your heart to invite in the visitor called Pain (in all its guises: fear, abandonment, rejection, victimhood, lack, anger, bitterness, jealousy, envy, selfishness, competition, self-loathing, self-abasement, and so forth.) Pain is there anyway, in the body and at the subconscious level, clouding our vision and directing our path. We don’t know this consciously. The initial experience was too much, too big for us to wrap our heads-hands-heart around and so we shoved it down down down into the recesses of our bodies.

And who shows up now but my emotions from six months ago…

I recall a situation in which I was triggered into self-loathing and then blame-anger-victim (a yummy cocktail indeed) but Husband was cool as Snoopy with his shades on. Snarky arrow flung and he was not bothered in the least while I felt personally pierced and seethed. Husband ambled into the next moment, just water off a duck’s back. When I dug deeper into the WHY, I realized that it wasn’t what was spoken that had hurt me – since Husband wasn’t upset, my reaction was mine alone to own – but something in me already that had reacted to the comment. I was triggered. Something outside of me poked at something already inside of me.

The pain already lodged in my body like fish hooks, piercing and painful… this is what was reacting.

The comment didn’t create my pain. Pain was already there, awaiting a trigger. And thank God for this trigger! At that point, I was able to see it and work with it. Explaining my heartache and taking ownership of my healing, I got with a good friend and allowed Pain to be… to be there, to be seen, welcomed, embraced. Without shaming, blaming, or judging, I felt It deeply and unabashedly – which was not safe to do at the initial situation – and within a few minutes, this visitor said its piece and left me in peace.

The key here is a compassionate witness, someone to hold sacred space, to sit with you as you intentionally allow whatever is in the body to be acknowledged, allowed, experienced. Finally experienced. No more shoved into the corner, told to SSSHHH, shamed or judged, and definitely not analyzed. Just plain ol’ ALLOWED TO BE THERE.

It’s a powerful thing, to feel your feelings. And empowering indeed!

Today, a friend of mine reached out to let me know that she is struggling with some childhood memories and physical pain that has been bubbling up for a few months now. Rather than try to figure out where it came from – don’t do this, please… a waste of energies and usually you’re wrong anyway – I recommended she acknowledge, allow, and rest into the experience. Open herself up to finally feel what’s been there all along… and sit with a gentle, kind witness who will hold her, remind her she’s loved and powerful, and maybe rub her feet.

The body is our greatest ally in the healing process, as it holds the wisdom and resources necessary for healing.
Peter Levine

I had this vision of her throwing her head back and howling from the core of her being, from that root chakra at her tailbone, just screaming out all the pain. Getting it out of her body, out of her heart, out of her mind, and out of her energetic field… a cleansing, carnal, animalistic roar that takes with it all the memories and emotions, thought patterns and injury.

Recovering from trauma is not about erasing the past; it is about reclaiming out power and rewriting our future.
Peter Levine

Lately I’ve been envisioning myself writing my own story, the unpacking of my life. Day to day, sentence at a time into paragraphs, chapters, books. When I awaken in the early morning, I mentally bring out the book I’ve been scripting, add a paragraph of gratitude, awe, wonder… add a sentence about miracles, divine relationships, ease of countenance… and close up the chapter with more gratitude and joy. And then I breathe deeply a few times, smile, pull my feet from under the covers, and arise, prepared to meet the day with all its ups-down-twists-turns and ALLOW it to unpack. Hand over heart, breathing, and peaceful. With an odd urge to dance….

Dance first. Think later. It’s the natural order.
Samuel Beckett

How about you? Are you open and willing to “dance first” and allow whatever emotional-physical-mental pain to show up at the party? Are you open and willing to love this sacred time with the visitor called Pain? Would you be a compassionate witness for both yourself and others on this human journey?

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate intentional mind-body connection for the purpose of healing trauma:

Find three songs that stir you right now. If possible, go outside. Bare feet on the ground, dance to these songs. Dance and allow the body to do whatever it wants. Dance like no one is watching!

(Heck, you may even find yourself down on all fours, head thrust back, mouth wide open in a good long howl. AAHH-OOOOOOOOOOOO And good on you!) 😉

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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EnergieGal

A flower knows, when its butterfly will return,
and if the moon walks out, the sky will understand;
but now it hurts, to watch you leave so soon,
when I don’t know, if you will ever come back.
Sanober Khan

Saying “good-bye,” even if it may just be “good-bye for now” is proving hard. I’ve known her for nearly thirty years. Half of my life!

She just showed up one day, full of vim and vigor, ideas and grit… we were going to take the world one step at a time, pulling it into the next iteration of wellness. We started out as a fitness studio, graduated to a fitness gym complete with equipment and numerous weekly aerobics and strength classes. We added personal fitness training, then life coaching and deeper spiritual inner child healing work. We wrote books and pamphlets, created videos and cassette tapes.

Yes, cassette tapes. It has been awhile! 😉

Oh the plans we made, the research we did, the people we met, the risks we took, the hours and dollars we spent, the conversations we had, the reinvention after rebranding we some days dragged ourselves through. All in the name of Love. We wanted to spread the news of self-care, holistic perspective to thriving, embodiment through breathwork, journaling, and contemplation, and empowerment via guided meditations, inner child healing, and shadow work.

We accomplished most of this – some might even cheerlead that we did it all, left everything out there, modeled authenticity and vulnerability, and practiced a contemplative approach to arriving more deeply into the body.

It was not without many tears, restless and sleepless nights, spending last dimes, and facing every fear. Appearing on camera, learning the technicalities of posting and using equipment, navigating various social media platforms… honestly, this part sucked. As an introvert and an empath, showing up and staying is not my strongest muscle…

And yet, here I am. Showing up. Staying. Being me, with my good and bad days, up and down moods, insecurities and jealousies… inviting them in to share, be heard, held, loved, allowed to be, felt deeply, embraced even if not quite understood… and, inch by inch, this has led me to The Door… labeled “Awakening”… and now I’m venturing on.

EnergieGal was that long dark hallway leading to The Next. Immensely helpful, she showed up at just the right time in my life when I craved purpose, direction, immersion, and freedom. She offered me the opportunity to learn more about myself, disordered eating and the way through this experience via moderate exercise and balanced nutrition. She created space for me to be in relationship with others, learn to be a leader and teacher, guide and entrepreneur. We didn’t make any income but we sure had a fun time sweating among friends, grapevining in the deep end of conversations, giggling through the ridiculousness of life, hugging through the heartaches. It was a holy time and I find myself very, very grateful.

I love you more than songs can say, but I can’t keep running after yesterday…
John Mayer

Over the past four years, I have tried repeatedly to rebrand and reinvent, but it’s never fruited. Seed after seed, watering for hours, weeding, weeding, waiting… what worked yesterday, last year, a decade ago refused to bud today. Surrendering. Saying good-bye. This was her final lesson for me. Allowing failure. Sitting with this most precious of experiences: dying, death, grieving, choosing to go on.

This is how much she has loved me. She insisted on staying until I’d sucked the marrow from the bone, overturned every stone, pebble, and grain of sand. (Okay, that is dramatic and an exaggeration… but it is what it felt like, in all those thirty years… she was a relentless task-master!)

Two roads diverged in a wood… oh, that I could travel both! But I have chosen the path less traveled, and this has made all the difference.
R. Frost

I do not know if I’ll pass this way again, if I’ll pick up the mantle of EnergieGal and venture further down the road with her. I’m open to this, though doubtful that this is our destiny. Like a book that has been read a thousand times, earmarked and scribbled in the margins, well-worn and cherished, she is the truest friend ever… but my sense is that it’s time to allow her to find a new reader, someone else to take the reigns and march forth into the newest iteration of wellness for the collective.

She’s taught me well and I wish only the best for her on her new adventure…

At last, the wheel comes full circle.
Cassandra Clare

I knew that it was time to let her go when I dreamed that someone else found her and they ran wild together, creating more programs and making lots of money,.. and I was thrilled. Happy. At peace.

Venture on, EnergieGal!

You’ve changed me forever. And I’ll never forget you.
Kiera Cass

How about you? Is there some aspect of your life that has been a part of you for what seems like forever? Or have you ever had to say good-bye? Or how are you at showing up? Staying? Where do you feel any of this in your physical body?

Here is a short practice that you can do right now to cultivate “allowing”:

Close your eyes. Place both of your hands over your heart. Become aware of your breath. As you breathe in through your nose, feel the air move in and find its way down into your belly. If you can, hold your breath gently for a few seconds, then slowly allow the breath to leave through your nose or your mouth. What a sacred practice, this mindful breathing! The start to an empowered relationship between you and your physical body. To life! To living! To showing up! To staying! To awakening!

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Modern Mystic & Life Coach

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Contentment is…

Woof, bark, yip-yappety, arf!
Gia, translated thus: Contentment is a whatever’s left in the peanut butter jar.

Long ago, I read a book by Byron Katie called LOVING WHAT IS. She is an amazing guide and I gleaned tremendously. Her wisdom ran a mile deep. Luckily, I have tall boots and could stay awhile, float in the depths of her stories, and swim madly in wave after wave.

When I am perfectly clear, what is is what I want.
Byron Katie

WHAT IS… is what I want. Sounds like contentment to me. That whatever is, whoever is, however is… is happening right on time, just as it is meant to be. It’s when I release controlling and thinking I have to manage and strategize, manipulate and figure out — exhausting — WHEN I LET GO, when I allow… when I throw my arms side to side, heart wide open, mouth full of gratitude… THIS is when contentment settles into me, into my space.

Whatever is happening right now is the best thing that could be happening!
me, and let me tell you that this is uncomfortable business but big time rewarding

This is when I not only experience “enough” and contentment, but when I BECOME that, when I EMBODY contentment. Contentment as a frequency in my physical body, and not just a thought, concept, or good idea.

I AM CONTENTMENT and therefore I experience contentment.

What happened was the best thing that could have happened.
Byron Katie

We want things to make sense. We’ve been taught, programmed even, to believe that we should be able to make logical sense of everything happening. Thinking that we are entitled to controlling how things turn out and how we feel — which, come on, we always want to feel comfortable — we manage and think three steps ahead, feeling victimized and helpless if we don’t get the best tickets, that car, a better house, the other to acknowledge our worthiness. We fear fear fear so much! People aren’t supposed to die (yes, they are) and we’re not supposed to feel so sad (there are seasons when this is exactly our fate) and we’re entitled to having every dream come into reality (I actually don’t think so, sweet soul. I know, hard to hear.)

The best thing that one can do when it is raining is let it rain.
H. W. Longfellow

We’re here in a human body to experience, er, being human… in all its messiness and heartache, misunderstandings and what-the-fucks. Life doesn’t make sense oftentimes. And yet. This is life.

Being content is not the same thing as being happy. It’s more like being grateful for what is and not trying to change things.
my friend Joel, who passed at age 63 full of contentment

What a gift, then, is this CONTENTMENT frequency. To be at ease in the heart, in the mind, and in the body with WHAT IS… which doesn’t mean you don’t ever want for anything else… but that you receive and allow for what is with an open heart and gentle spirit.

For just one second, look at your life and see how perfect it is. Stop looking for the next secret door that is going to lead you to your real life. Stop waiting. This is it: there’s nothing else. It’s here, and you’d better decide to enjoy it or you’re going to be miserable wherever you go, for the rest of your life, forever.
Lev Grossman, The Magicians

As an aside, I think you can be content and grieve simultaneously. It may be one of those things in life that just doesn’t make sense. And yet. This is life.

If I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn’t there, I never really lost it to begin with.
The Wizard of Oz

This has been a learned practice for me, and one which I am still a second-grader most days if I’m being honest. Contentment does not come naturally and some days not easily for me. I am that always-reaching-always-more-always-digging kid… but many days, it’s digging in the manure pile for the pony so there’s that. I am, after all this time, maturing, growing, allowing, surrendering, thanking.

Just tell yourself, Duckie, you’re really quite lucky.
Dr. Seuss

Content. With what is. No more, no less. Here, now.

These aren’t platitudes. Those suck big donkey balls and bare no fruit by harvest, so great ideas and nicie-nice hopefuls is not what I’m suggesting here. Nope. That would be cruel and a waste of time.

What I am saying is, with a practice of gratitude and intention, we can allow energies of lack and victimhood, entitlement and fear to be dislodged, felt, and moved through our bodies… giving rise to peace, love, joy, contentment.

Loving what is… contentment.

How about you? Can you feel this contentment frequency into your body? What does this feel like in you? What does being content mean to you right now? How would we all benefit from allowing “this much” to be ENOUGH and be content with what is?

Here is a short practice you can do right now to allow CONTENTMENT:

Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and smile. Roll your shoulders around a few times, hug your arms deeply then open them up widely side-to-side. Lift your chin. Speak: I AM I AM I AM. Imagine a large tree full of leaves, laden heavy with an array of gorgeous colors. Notice them for as long as you want.

Edgy, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

If you like these ponderings, please check out my 30-day journals. They’re just perfect for someone like you. 🙂 Downloadable pdfs on a variety of topics. Sure to encourage, inspire, motivate, and create meaningful ponderings. ❤

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Where’s The Peace?

Life comes from you and reflects back to you.

The other day I was experiencing a bit of a rough patch. Emotionally, high-low and feeling so raw; mentally, the dryer called my brain wouldn’t stop tumbling; physically, I ached into the marrow of my bones. I mean, sheeeesh.

I called out, “I just wanna feel peaceful!”

Then I heard the Still Small Voice. “So, be at peace.”

It was then that I realized that I was insisting that life organize itself SO THAT I can feel peaceful… when I know that the way it works is that I FEEL PEACEFUL and life organizes itself around that frequency.

Now, not easy-peasy… but do-able.

I chose in that moment to find something for which to be thankful, breathed deeply a few times, focused on opening my heart-space, and watered my plants. I then took a few minutes to listen to a guided meditation and rest.

My nervous system calmed; I began to feel at peace. And the world around me began to look different. I saw more Hope, more Joy, more Community.

Emerging can be scary, uncomfortable… but only because it’s unfamiliar, not because we can’t…

If today you find yourself feeling out of sync, agitated, despaired, exhausted… some days, me too. We’re not alone in this metamorphosis! We’re emerging together… so take heart, slow down, breathe, reach out… know that I love you… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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Losing Control & BECOMING

We’re BECOMING more human… we’re EMERGING from caterpillar-to-mush-to-butterfly. We’re experiencing all the drama, the depths, and the desires. We’re alchemizing, transmuting, and transforming. Welcome to your life!

Daughter called in a panic last night. Snow on the highway and she skidded. It wasn’t like last year when she lost control on the 219, doing a U-ey and hitting the guard rail. Still, it was damn scary for her.

And for me. There’s something about hearing your child’s panic that causes you to sit up at full attention and take charge. Or at least, that’s the way it for me. Mama Bear mode immediately turns on and I’m on the prowl. I will protect my young at any and all costs. I don’t mean to be this way. It’s an automatic reaction. And one for which I have no apology.

My children are my heart walking around outside my body. Protective a bit? Uhm, oh heck yes.

Mom, everything is okay. Well, kinda. Sorta. I’m, I’m, I’m pulled over and really scared. I skidded and I’m so afraid to drive now.
Daughter, with labored breathing and racing mind

Why is it that my first reaction is to want to get in the car and drive there and hug her and let her know that she is safe and I will always protect her? Like, it’s visceral. Fierce like a lion. Or a mama bear. I can almost feel the growl making its way up from my guts and out my mouth.

I will stay on the line with you. We will get you home safely! I will do whatever it takes, hon. I will never leave you.
Me… and I may have even actually growled but maybe not, I don’t know, I get lost and forget in all the words and sniffles

We both want to stay in control. To be in control and stay there, goddammit. She wants to control the weather and the car; I want to control the weather and the car and her safety and her happiness and her – oh god, well, her everything.

Truth. I can’t stay to know my children – or others, each and every one – are afraid, out of sorts, disappointed, discouraged, grieving…

And yet, all of these are part of our human evolution, our Becoming, our physical experience here on Mother Earth. Even my wanting to protect is an experience! Even my cringeing at anyone’s discomfort is part of my experience!

It’s all part of it. The Becoming. Every conversation, every experience, every feeling, every memory… all part of this beautiful EMERGING.

Daughter arrived safely at her gym, chewed up a short workout – which helped her calm down into her body – and we resumed our chat-while-I-navigate-these-sucky-snowy-roads. Nestled into her apartment, she bid me good night.

It’s these little things, these small moments and tiny conversations that make up a life, that create a more evolved human – one that is “more”.

more aware of their heart space
more awake to their role in others’ lives
more plugged in to this breath, this moment
more grateful for just this breath, this moment
more insightful
more wise
more peaceful, calm in the midst of the chaos

Two roads. I am meandering down the less taken. It’s making all the difference.

If today you find yourself panicky, sometimes me too. Breathe. Reach out. You’re not alone. We are not alone. And we are definitely, oh most definitely loved… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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Massage Anyone?

Me: How you feeling after the catheter was removed?

Her: Awful. I just feel drained.

Me: I’ll be right over!
how I responded to BFF’s post-surgery blues

And not only did I pop over for a visit… I brought massage oil. Because nothing grounds us into our bodies and relaxes us more than a foot massage. Yes, please and thank you!

It’s been a long journey for her. Numerous surgeries, recoveries, pain, disappointment when the pain continued and there required yet another operation. It’s just been a damn lot on her and it’s hurting me to witness her struggling in the midst of this latest invasive procedure.

But I remain hopeful! The surgeon is new and passionate and learned, asks good questions, appears wise and caring. She offered a different approach – yes, invasive – but one which we hope reorganizes the mess of organs and scar tissue in there.

The real purpose of giving massage is to foster more depth of feeling for one another in order to bring out the love that often lies buried beneath the pain of everyday suffering.
Robert Calvert

We had a few hearty laughs together, me with her feet in my hands. I can’t love her more than I do right now. She’s the BEST.

This is friendship. We care for one another, through good times and bad, fearful moments, celebrations, frustrations, and operations. It’s what we do, right? We’re there for each other, holding hands, hearts, space…

and sometimes even feet.

If today you find yourself drained, frustrated, and in pain… consider a foot massage. They’re grounding, energizing, calming… it feels good to be touched, listened to, honored. I’m sorry you’re struggling, dear One. I’m here for you… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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Peace Starts Here

The capacity for getting along with our neighbor depends to a large extent on the capacity for getting along with ourselves.

The self-respecting individual will try to be as tolerant of his neighbor’s shortcomings as he is of his own.
E. Hoffer

FurButt Gia and LilFurButt Peaches… two peas in a pod… enjoying an evening on the couch. Theirs is a simple world – heavenly, even. They’re fed, warmed, petted, tended. It’s a good life indeed.

They haven’t always seen eye to eye, paw to paw, tail to tail. Peaches was here first and claimed that Alpha vibe upon Gia’s arrival. Gia, all 75 pounds of her, begged to differ.

It’s been a journey… I guess even being a pet can be a lot. 😉

We’re thrilled to report that acclimation has been reached. They may even consider each other friends. They share the same water bowl, often eat the same food. (That’s not my idea… they each get their own food dish.) They nap on the same doggie bed upstairs in the hall and share the same end of the couch. There is peaceful co-existence among the pets here at our house.

Gia is fully aware of Peaches’ knack for the dramatic.
Peaches gives plenty of space to Gia’s awkward gait and occasional need to chase, bark, and otherwise disrupt the calm.

We don’t get harmony when everyone sings the same note. Only notes that are different can harmonize. The same is true of people.
S. Goodler

… and pets …

Why can’t we all just get along?
Husband’s favorite sentiment

Fear. Fear is why… but we’ll continue that convo another day… today, Gia and Peaches are getting it right and it’s a start. For this, we’re thankful.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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On Patience – and Labor

Patience is not sitting and waiting, it is foreseeing. It is looking at the thorn and seeing the rose, looking at the night and seeing the day. Lovers are patient and know that the moon needs time to become full.
Rumi

Sister has asked me to create for her a long sound bowl bath on my YouTube channel. She enjoys these frequency-baths very much and wants something she can listen to as she nods off, something that is still playing should she awaken through the night.

Ya know, something 8 hours long…

Immediately I got to work! Creating, editing, looping, uploading, uploading, uploading.

UPLOADING.

Little was I aware that the uploading process would consume 36 hours of my life! Little was I aware that my browser was set to “go to sleep” every few minutes… which meant that, to maintain a connection for uploading to occur, I had to “wiggle the mouse” every few minutes… for 36 hours.

36 hours, people. 36 hours.

Well, the good news is… I’m nearly there! I’ve discovered a few things on this adventure:

I can reset my browser to stay the eff awake for an hour before I have to mouse-wiggle. This, of course, I learned AFTER the 36 hours. :-0
I am a really patient soul. I breathed into each hour, thankful for one more down and this-many-more to go… I amazed even mahself. 😉
I love my sister… well, duh, knew I loved her… but there bubbled up within me a Love that surpasses understanding… like a dog with a bone, a goddamn mama bear… a protective, relentless spirit arose within me that I knew was there for my children but hey it’s here for Sister too… ❤

The work has been intense, the labor long and tedious, but the fruit on the tree is pleasing and worth it all. I’m just so excited to share this labor of love and patience with Sister and my YouTube community.

Patience does not mean to passively endure. It means to be farsighted enough to trust the end result of a process.
Elif Shafak

Every single on of these souls is worth all my efforts… for truly, we are One. When any one of us is healed, cared for, tended to, gifted… WE ALL ARE.

That said… I am off for a nap as I anticipate with sheer excitement the culmination of many hours of work, a ton of patience, and one really great idea (thanks, Sis!) 🙂 ❤

If today you find yourself on the giving end, thank you. I receive your Love. On the receiving end? Thank you for accepting my Love to you. We are ONE… and here’s a work of art: 8 HOUR SOUND BATH … aaaaaand here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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SACRED PRACTICE

The body never lies.

I was having an anxiety attack. It wasn’t a big one, and I was doing my very best to control it, understanding it, reason with it, push it into the corner and coax it back down in the basement.

Because I had company. And having a panicky episode is messy and embarrassing and oh-my-god-no-not-in-front-of-others… I’m not one to unpack all my shit out loud. Middle of the night, journaling, under a tree, to the FurButt… but not at a dinner gathering.

But energies do what they do. The body reacts the way it does and begs to be heard, seen, honored on its journey through the ache to healing. Nothing in us wants to be rejected, not even the pain.

I was being given the opportunity to welcome the emotions and memories bubbling up in this moment in response to an event that was happening that was triggering something from the deep. Uncomfortable, yes. Messy, oh friggin’ yes.

But here we were, being invited into the depths of my ache, into the recesses of Pain for the purpose of revelation and healing.

It’s a damn lot, this human experience. A damn lot. 😉

Husband knew I was struggling in the deep end and threw a life vest my way best he could: he talked me logically through the situation, pointing out how “your conclusions are wrong and here are the correct ways to think and so now all is well and please god feel better because I love you and seeing you like this is making me frustrated.”

I recognized his kindness but the life vest wasn’t helpful. I needed more than an intellectual argument to see me through to Peace.

Luke was visiting… he quietly asked if I would be open to putting my hand on his heart, his hand on my heart, and we breathed together. Deep breaths in (my mind is calm) and releasing breaths (my body is at peace.) Deep breaths in (thank you) and releasing breaths (I love you.) Long, long hug… we embraced until I pulled away, which was settling, grounding, assuring.

In this short few minutes, we had stepped out of time, out of space… into the Wonder-land of Peace.

Few words, energetic connection through the hands – such vital chakra points here – and the heart – big portal IN – and the breath. MAGICAL.

I understood that the young child within me had been abandoned and she created a story of death around that long-ago event that I had now brought into my present moment, and it was triggered by a current event (the SD card wouldn’t go into a camera I had just purchased… go figure, it would seem these two events could not be related but the body has a way of revealing unhealed parts in the oddest ways.)

Talking me through at that time wasn’t helpful. Approaching my body energetically through heart-hand-breath calmed my nervous system and created a frequency in which I could “hear” Husband’s logic.

Body’s nervous system first. Approach the body-held trauma first via energies. When ready, re-organize thoughts, allowing old mindsets to be revealed and re-storied. But the body FIRST.

Luke reminded me that I am the one who showed him the heart-hand-breath practice… yes, I knew this healing path… but I also have come to realize that healing is done in community, among us all, in safe space, willing hearts, open hands, and slowed breath.

It was a magical evening indeed.

If today you find yourself in panic mode, I really do understand what you’re going through… so keep going! Don’t stop! The only way out is through, IN to the heart space, that portal into the Depths where True Identity resides and healing abides. Let’s go there together… and here’s a looooooooong hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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Yay But Nay

Having a child is like wearing your heart outside of your body.
Erma Bombeck

SecondSon bought a new house. We went to see it today. I love it! He loves it! The house itself needs work, yes, but it’s definitely worthy of being called Home. The land on which Home sets upon is DIVINE. I love it! He loves it!

Home is two hours away from me. I don’t love it! Neither does he!

And yet… he ventures on into this new territory. Excited, wide-eyed, full of ideas, dreams, hopes. I love it! He loves it!

The human heart was not designed to beat outside the human body and yet, each child represented just that — a parent’s heart bared, beating forever outside its chest.
Debra Ginsberg

I am finding this to be one of my most difficult seasons. SecondSon and ThirdSon live two hours and 26 hours away. I feel their absence deep into my bones and I ache. And yet, I rejoice for them. They’re living their lives out loud and making a splash. How can I be anything but beside them in excitement, encouragement, and elation?

Mothers and their children are in a category all their own. There’s no bond so strong in the entire world. No love so instantaneous and forgiving.
Gail Tsukiyama

And so, I’m learning to hold both. I’m learning to hold both deep gladness and deeper sadness within my heart, into the marrow of my bones. I am learning to show them my smiles and hip-hip-hurrah’s, saving my tears for the prayer closet and conversations with God and Husband.

Motherhood is the biggest gamble in the world. It is the glorious life force. It’s huge and scary — it’s an act of infinite optimism.
Gilda Radner

I see how my FiveBeautifulSouls are each journeying so bravely, so full of wonder and awe and a willingness to RISK and fail and try again and fall and get up and go at it again… and I feel proud. I’ve done well that my children would love themselves and honor their dreams enough to follow them, even when those dreams take them far from me. I have taught them to LIVE FULLY, to grab life by the short ones and give a good goddamn yank. I love it!

The art of mothering is to teach the art of living to children.
Elaine Heffner

Perhaps I’ll move someday or perhaps they’ll move again… and we’ll find ourselves closer in physical proximity. One thing I know is that our bond, our emotional proximity, is as tight-close-nestled-in as ever, regardless of where any of us call Home. There are no neighborhoods or states between our heartbeats. I love it!

If today you find yourself missing someone, me too. I really dig where you’re at right now. Perhaps walking beside each other for a stretch would help us both to remember that no distance or time can separate us from our loved ones. We are one. Always. Forever. No matter what… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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Memory Lane

A LIGHTWORKER’S CREED

I am a Lightworker

I awoke so that others may awaken

I learn so that others may also learn

I transform so that others may also transform

I lighten my load so that others may change theirs

I learn to see so that others may also see

I forgave myself so that I may help others to forgive

I love myself so that I can bring out love to others

I am a lightworker

I live to give comfort

I live to shine loving light onto others

I live to heal

I live to give hope

I live for truth

I live to love.

Spent four hours with a dear friend from the long-ago. We chatted nonstop. We listened nonstop. We giggled, hugged, mirrored, honored. It was magical and I loved every moment.

We are both Intuitive Healers, Spiritual Guides with a passion to help others help themselves, to wake up, to discover, remember, and BE who they are. It is sacred work, sometimes exhausting but always exhilarating and rewarding.

She talked Numerology; Vibration and Frequency was my lingo… but at its core, we both spoke Love.

Each of us is on our healing journey still which keeps us humble and open, compassionate and gentle with others. I’m thankful to know her, to be able to share this leg of the journey with her. She’s high vibe.

She’s full of integrity. I like to believe this is where we meet, at our integrity and sense of responsibility.

She oozes great ideas, bold networking possibilities and cool workshop ideas. I do not. We do NOT meet here… 😉

Yep, it’s a good thing I know her… she gets me “out there” and invites me into her life, grabs hold of this introvert’s hand if necessary. 😉

Life will always lead you where you can do the most good. Your presence is needed here.

Friends. Holy connections. Sacred.

If today, you find yourself feeling lonely, whisper “I am open to a friend” and open your heart and arms to what comes next… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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First Snow!

The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a MAGICAL event. You go to bed in one kind of a world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment… then where is it to be found?
J. B. Priestley

Yes, it snowed for the first time this latter part of the year. I was surprised, not having even an inkling that it was on its way. Awoke to take FurButt for her morning constitutional only to find that I would indeed need my boots, coat, hat, and scarf.

It was absolutely delightful!

With First Snow, everything looks different, smells different when it’s snowing. There is a calm, a hush that permeates the air, my soul. I feel more grounded, less stressed, more open. Excitement for the season ahead rushes through my veins and I ponder cookie recipes and get out pen and paper to log Christmas gift ideas.

First Snow. Enchanting.

Magical indeed.

Someone remind me of this when I forget at about the 13th friggin’ damn stupid snowfall and I’m sick of shoveling and where the hell are my boots anyway who thought it was a good idea to live here oh my god where are my gloves…

… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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Down The Rabbit Hole

Am I going mad?

You’re mad, bonkers, completely off your head. But I tell you a secret. All the best people are.
Alice in Wonderland

My son and daughter-in-love dressed up for Halloween this year… again. It may be their favorite holiday. Witches and brew? Cackle-cackle… Vampires and pirates? Let me drink your blood, Cap’n!

Last year, they busted it all out. FourthSon was afraid they may have outdone themselves, leaving a hole in their hearts for this year … the only hole was the one Alice went down because this year THEY ROCKED IT OUT COMPLETELY!

Off with their heads!

Oh, Alice… in Wonderland. Struggling with the constraints and expectations placed upon her by society, she is learning the importance of embracing her true self. Wildly and unabashedly finding out who she is – oh the discovery! oh the remembrance! – and then BEING — The Great I AM, The Holy, the God-spark, The Light, The Source of Love.

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn’t. And contrary-wise, what is, it wouldn’t be. And what it wouldn’t be, it would. You see?

Self-discovery! Stay curious, Alice. Allow those worlds of reality and dream to mingle, to soften their edges and blend. This is your world, Alice.

“I don’t think”… then you shouldn’t talk, said the Hatter.

This is your world, Lisa. Stay curious, Awakening Soul. Heart wide open, fear not the missteps and misunderstandings. Fear more pretending, fear more trying to be what you’re not, fear more bending a knee to rules and religion, fear more sacrificing your soul.

A dream is not reality. But who’s to say which is which?

Yes, stay curious. Keep that childlike wonder… and, who knows, very soon now perhaps you may find yourself in Wonderland after all.

If today you hear your doorbell and see a bunch of costumed souls, go answer the door. Bring candy. Happy Hallowe’en… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Intuitive Healer & Spiritual Guide

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We’ve Got HEAT!

Patience is not the ability to wait, but to keep a good attitude while waiting.
not me – until a few years ago

Here’s the deal. With Mars as my chart ruler and all the way up there in the 10th and 11th houses, well, patience is going to be something I learn not something I’m born with. Fact and true story, dat.

Yep, a messy damn thing, me being human.

But I’m “getting there” though where ‘there’ is is anyone’s best guess… I am more patient in these past few years, more grounded, observant, open, and willing to allow and even embrace exactly what’s unpacking in the moment. No more trying to wiggle and struggle, pry and supplicate for anything differenter than what is.

All this to say… it’s taken 30 years for us to get heat in our barn. Today, the plumbers are out there and by end of day, that beautiful ol’ horse barn is going to be warm enough to house my Vibrational Sound Therapy business, my fitness equipment, an entertainment area for our future grandbabes, and a space for small retreats and guided meditations.

I couldn’t be more excited and thankful!

For 30 years, I’ve desired this… and one obstacle after another blocked its manifestation. A couple of months ago, the ocean parted and we tentatively began our march across to the other side… yeah, that’s dramatic… but, ya know, THIRTY YEARS of waiting will do this to a soul.

Our patience will achieve more than our force.
Edmund Burke

Dear Universe and Me, thank you for the barn, for the heat in it, and for the lesson in growing in patience. There really IS something so incredibly empowering about being able to breathe through a situation, not react, not insist on my own way, and not melt into victim mode at the first sign of difficulty.

If today you find yourself at the end of your patience rope, I get it. Breathe. Ask yourself if this situation will matter in five years, five months, five days, five minutes… and know that I love you, I see you, I feel you… and together, we can remember our patience-super-power… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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What The Leaves Are Teaching Me

Everyone must take time to sit and watch the leaves change.
Elizabeth Lewis

I could leave it at that.

Time.

Sit.

Watch.

The leaves are changing color and I am blessed to hear their message: slow down, sit with us, watch us go from green to yellow, red, orange, brown. Aren’t we magnificent?

Why, yes. Yes, you are.

If today you find yourself in a hurry, me too… but I am allowing myself to become more curious about listening, slowing down, taking time, sitting, watching the leaves show off, and breathing. Just breathing. Will you please join me? And here’s a hug…

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Me. Brave.

I’ve been doing a lot of brave shit lately.

I prefer the quiet, behind-the-scenes life, thank you very much God and well shit you had other plans and here I am freakin’ “out there” and being vulnerable and raw and real and authentic af.

And, well, it’s been a damn lot.

But each day, it gets a little easier. Out from behind the masks of perfection, got-it-all-together, people-pleasing, and trying-so-hard… and wearing only ME. I’ve been on this journey for about 12 years now. I mean, awake and aware to the fact that this is my intention – to come out, to be real, to allow myself to be seen, heard... and oh my god maybe judged or misunderstood.

Breathe, Lisa.

This is why you’re here, soul known as Lisa. Vulnerability is raw, yes, but someone has to get this party started. Where there is AUTHENTICITY, shame dies. Guilt leaves. Disappointment dissolves. Laughter erupts. Joy abides. Pleasure multiplies. Lives are healed.

So, dear Awakening Soul Lisa, LIVE OUT LOUD. Be your weird-ass, bumbly, fumbly, mumbly self… in all your glory. You, my dearest, are healing the world.

If today, you too find yourself kinda sorta left-of-center, outside-looking-in… then join our community. You sound perfect for us and we’ve held a seat just for ya… and here’s a hug. ❤

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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What Is True Love?

True love is damageable but not breakable.
Luke DeVita

Today I uploaded a podcast. It’s been a minute since I ventured into podcast-land… life got busy and the Universe had other plans. Lots of heart stuff I had to yet allow to bubble up, feel, alchemize, transform… and I am in process (always) but feel more like ME… I’ve done more discovering, remembering, and now BEing who I AM.

It’s a damn lot, this human experience! 😉

Back at it, my first guest is a WONDER and an AWE. He leads me right into The Real, that royal palace I call Home. He is insightful, soft-spoken, and a force of Love.

Meet Luke DeVita.

If today you find yourself lonely, feeling marginalized or lost, without clarity, could use some encouragement… me too. That’s why I’m here… grab my hand and let’s travel down this road together for a bit, shall we? And here’s a hug. ❤

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Introducing Lindy

Never say there is nothing beautiful in the world anymore. There is always something to make you wonder in the shape of a tree, the trembling of a leaf.
Albert Schweitzer

Trees. They are my best friends.

I personally selected the above tree – called Lindy – about ten years ago. We had to hew a tree and that means only one thing to me: plant two more trees.

Husband sent me off to the greenhouse with $100 in my pocket. At first sight, Lindy and I fell madly-deeply in love with each other and I just had to have Him. Or He had to have me. At $150, it was the deal of a lifetime and a match made in Heaven!

The arborist promised He would grow quickly and spread His limbs like a butterfly fresh out of the cocoon and realizing its wings. As far as the east is from the west, Lindy has embraced His piece of the sky in front of our house… and we couldn’t feel more blessed, honored, and enamored by Him.

Breathless, really. There are times I pull into the driveway and my breath catches in my throat. “My God, Lindy. You are magnificent!”

Trees give peace to the souls of men.
Norah Waln

Lindy has witnessed our FiveBeautifulSouls coming of age and leaving the nest and will continue to be a part of our family’s experiences: marriages, grandbabies, new friendships budding, old friendships passing away, graduations, birthday parties, and Christmas gatherings. He and I will continue to converse long and deep about all matters mysterious and provocative, me with my back against His trunk and His leaves shading my skies.

Trees are sanctuaries. Whoever knows how to speak to them, whoever knows how to listen to them, can learn the truth.
Herman Hesse

Lindy will be here for hundreds of years yet… stable, strong, resilient. He’ll witness other families’ lives evolving and continue to provide high vibration for our world’s evolutionary “wake-up” journey.

Thank you, Lindy, my confidante and spectacular example. I love you.

If today, you find yourself lonely or out of sorts, thirsting clarity or company, find a Lindy of your own… sit, breathe, receive. Allow yourself to melt into Tree, its frequency of Unconditional Love embracing every part of you… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Here. I. Come.

What will you do with this one wild and precious life?
Mary Oliver

This is one of my favorite quotes and is speaking to me bigly in this particular season of my life. I have SO MANY TABS open right now. The creativity is flowing and the courage is right behind it, pushing and tossing and frothing and rarin’ to GO!

I began a YouTube channel years ago with lackluster results. On a mission to figure out how I can improve my receptivity, I researched for hours one weekend. Ah, yes. Now I realize that if there was something “wrong” that I could do, I did it.

Create various playlists that don’t have anything to do with each other and confuses the algorithm — check!
Forget to post for days and weeks so that YouTube forgets about you — check!
Spend hours researching and never quite get to recording the damn thing — check!
Record it, finally, and then spend hours nit-picking… oh, sweet rut of perfectionism, how deeply you pull me in and hold me hostage — check!

So, I’ve created separate YouTube channels – which is as much work as it sounds – but I am passionate about creating a community for awakening souls to gather, to feel embraced, safe, heard, seen, challenged, held accountable, and find that they are their own JOY.

It’s a damn lot, this being human and learning how to swim in the deep end of social media as an introvert hippie… a damn lot.

Luckily, I’ve got help and a lot of vision… after four long years of inward, I am now headed onward and upward. And I couldn’t be more excited-scared-terrified-eager to get out there.

Here. I. Come.

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bud.
Anais Nin

For the Love of All of us, I’m budding already… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Happy 30th, ThirdSon

Swiggity-swag.
ThirdSon’s fave quote

So let’s be honest. He’s my favorite child. Just ask him. 😉

Here’s why he thinks he’s my fave… he came out crying thirty years ago. Red, pissed off, scrunched up, and crying. He continued to cry for four years. Not a typo. Four years. He cried for four years.

Four. Years.

(He must have gotten it all out of his system because he is the most chill, peaceful, laid-back soul I have ever had the privilege to hang with. Easy energies.)

But for four years, he and I were besties. He wouldn’t go to anyone else and frankly, no one else wanted him around much either. Understandable. He was crying if I wasn’t there. Crying if I was there sometimes too.

He was crying. A lot.

By four or five years old, he settled into his body and decided sticking around on planet Earth was the plan and he began eating and socializing, sleeping through the night and pooping on his own (long story, don’t ask) and talking. All this to say, the amount of time in crying-mode radically decreased.

Among his first comments as he began to verbalize was “I know I’m your favorite, Mommy” to which I replied, “You sure are but let’s keep that on the DL – you have four siblings and we want them feeling loved and special.” –wink wink nudge giggle —

Him: yep, I’m your favorite

Me: what makes you say this

Him: you always snuggled with me most of the day while everyone else was playing or being with others… it was always you and me!

I’ll admit to whispering to every one of my FiveBeautifulSouls, “you are my favorite!” And it was absolutely true. It’s a mom-thing. Time divides, yes, but Love multiplies. Of course ThirdSon understands himself to be my favorite. I told him so and kept him on my lap much of the day – because he’d cry if I didn’t.

Today, on his 30th birthday, he is charitable, grounded, curious, brave, funny. We all agree that he is the best Christmas gift giver ever, clever and kind. While living in Florida, he continues to text me most days and flies home a few times yearly. Goal-oriented and ambitious, he’s willing to try new and scary things, mess up, get up and try again, and laugh at himself. He is fully inked, arms and legs. He’s working on his shoulders and chest and back yet. He is a masterpiece!

Self confident and full of self esteem, he is an example of Godness and Joy to me. When he wiggled his way into my world, I didn’t know the immensity of amazingness I was going to be experiencing through him.

Swiggity-swag, indeed.

To you, Alex, on the celebration of your 30th birthday. I am deeply thankful you chose me as your Mom, card partner and tennis/pickleball ally. Your presence in my life has made all the difference. Love to you, my favorite child. 😉

Always and forever, no matter what. ❤

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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The Bravest Thing

We think that holding on makes us strong but sometimes it is letting go.
H. Hesse

I did a very brave thing indeed. I signed up for a half marathon a few months ago… not brave. For me. I’ve raced many… this morning, the day of the race, I backed out.

I. Backed. Out.

Me: hey, not going

Husband: whew, I didn’t want to either… doesn’t feel right today for some reason

Me: it would be easier to go, ya know

Husband: for you, it sure would… something on your list ain’t getting done today

Me: I think I’m rewiring something deep inside… pushing-pulling-forcing is so familiar and comfortable, but I feel Love opening up a door within me, a door labeled “let go”

Husband: sometimes Plan B really is just Plan B

When I signed up for the race, I knew in my guts that I didn’t want to do it. The people-pleasing-Me hissed, “he wants to do it and you don’t wanna be left behind so sign up, ignore that other voice that coos and caresses… it’s a wimp.” Every part of my body bucked when I hit the YES button… It knew that saying YES to pressure and guilt and shame meant saying NO to my Truth.

I’ve been wrestling with fear of abandonment for years. Parents divorced before I have memory but I have a deep sensitivity to feeling like I must keep up with the group or die. Extreme, yes. Visceral, yes. Reasonable and true? No. But trauma doesn’t dot the i’s and cross the t’s.

This being human thing…. well, it’s a damn lot. For me. So much learning, pondering, alchemizing, transforming. I give me a load of credit for sticking with it, staying curious, compassionate, and courageous. 🙂

Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.

It’s a season of coming face-to-face with Me, the deep and the wide of who I Am… the Godness and Wonder, Joy and Miracle, Light and Love, Spirit and Awakening Christ. Anything and everything else that I believe about Me is being shed, peeled away, molted, LET GO.

no more people pleasing
no more hoping everyone around me is happy
no more believing it’s my job to make sure they are
maybe I’ll make some waves
maybe I’ll take a nap
maybe some day I’ll sign up for a race
and maybe I’ll race it
and enjoy it
and it’ll be the Truest Me racing it

Letting go is the cornerstone of change.

There’s no longer any space in my Being and life for victimhood, lack mentality, people-pleasing, guilt, shame, or any of the other FEARS. I AM the Phoenix Rising, coming out of the ashes of pain and abuse, flying higher than ever and seeing the Big Picture. I AM no longer afraid that I don’t fit it, that I’m a burden, that my light is too bright and offensive, that my existence is just too much for people.

I don’t fit it.
I am sometimes a burden in that I refuse to be anyone other than ME.
My light is bright and I’ll probably offend some folks.
My existence has been too much for some. Not my problem.

This morning, I did a very brave thing indeed. I didn’t show up for a race because I was busy showing up for myself. Braver still, I may sign up and run a race someday because they really can be a load of fun… but I’ll push the YES button when it’s YES to Me.

If today you find yourself showing up for anyone else but you, so afraid to be left behind, forgotten, abandoned, deemed inadequate and unworthy, I truly understand. Breathe. Sit under Tree, let Mother Earth hold you, remind you that you’re here to remember who you are – Godness and Light, Love Itself – and to swim in the deep end of Joy… racing sneakers on or not… you are loved… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Lonely? Sad? Try This…

I have learned that there is more power in a good strong hug than in a thousand meaningful words.

I have found myself hugging more lately. It’s not been intentional, but as I wander into the next season of my life, I seem to crave more human contact. There’s just something about a hug.

I think that hugs are the most healing thing ever.

It’s actually a very intimate act, hugging. Especially if you maintain that hug for quite a few seconds, like twenty… initially I felt that perhaps I was imposing upon the other, but these long-held hugs have been received with gratitude, if not a little but of surprise.

Human touch is vital. Without it, we wither. With it, we thrive. It is good preventive medicine.
Steve Goodler

Our bodies say more to each other than our words ever could. I do a great deal of counseling and when I sense that the other has gotten themselves twisted and turned around, all bunched up, exhausted with explanation and desire for “the answer,” I’ll quietly offer a hug. In that safe space of feeling held, seen, heard, known, believed, there’s deep healing.

Hugging is the silent way of saying “you matter to me.”

From this nest of safety, our beings are more courageous to open. Open our hearts, open our minds, open our perspectives. There are some things we just can’t will ourselves into… but, perhaps, there is movement and flow when we open our bodies to be hugged, to be embraced right there in the moment, messiness and all.

We need 4 hugs daily for survival, 8 for maintenance, 12 for growth.
V. Star

This being human journey is a damn lot. We’re hurting, scared, easily triggered, stuck up in our minds, in the past, or way out ahead of ourselves in the future. Hugs have a way of bringing us back to here and now, this moment.

A good long hug marks the occasion… it’s like saying “let’s remember this, you and me right here and now, forever” without saying a word. It’s like saying, “there’s nothing more important in this moment than feeling your heart beating and listening to your breath.” Hugging good and long slows everything down, peeling away all the fluff and leaving just the Raw Real.

Sometimes a silent hug is the only thing to say.
Robert Brault

As I continue on my journey of loving others as myself — for, truly truly I tell you, there are no others — I will speak less, listen more, and hug much more. And there will be healing, there will be awakening, there will be connection, there will be community, there will be peace on earth. Amen.

If today you find yourself lonely, perhaps offer a hug… to your grandchild, neighbor, significant other, friend, pet… and – oh this is brave – hold on. Breathe a few deep breaths together. Find Harmony, Common Vibe, Calm… ah, and here’s a hug from me.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Kindness Rocks

In a world where you can be anything, be kind.

I’m not sure I can be “anything” but I do know that I can be kind. Yes, people are hurting and so they bleed on others who didn’t cut them. Yes, people are in a hurry and push and shove and try to keep up, fall down messily and blame others. Yes, people react out of their pain and swim in the deep end of victim mentality.

It’s a damn lot, this being human journey.

I get it. Being kind is not always the easiest action… but it’s always, always the highest vibration. Love is always the answer, whatever the question.

Two young souls – college grads – have been offering me so much time and guidance regarding setting up YouTube channels, creating videos, making the visual and audio professional, writing out all sorts of directions (because the learning curve is steep for this nearly 60-year-old non-tech blogger.)

And while I appreciate their time, their professional know-how, and their encouragement… I am most thankful for their kindness. If I asked once, I asked ten times and never did either roll an eye or huff-n-puff. Smiling, they found a different way to say the same thing and got out the pad of paper to write it all down for me.

Not only that, but they took the time to really listen to what we were recording… and to offer — oh this is risky! — to suggest that I do a retake because, while it was articulate and polished, it also wasn’t genuine.

Them: uhm, sounds like it was a script

Me: well, it was

Them: let’s go for a walk, bare feet in the grass, and just breathe

Me: okaaaaayyy….

Them: because we know you and we adore you and we want the most authentic you to shine through

Me: so, how should I do that?

Them: tell your story… not from your mind but from your heart

Walk done, shoes back on, butt in the chair, camera rolling… and in one sloppy take, I poured forth my story. It was messy and incomplete and a bit rambly. But it was ME.

Being on the receiving end of such bountiful kindness is the best thing ever. EVER. Their kindness allowed me to receive their critique and trust their gentle coaxing to a very vulnerable place. Deep within. With the camera rolling.

Kindness really is a super power. And I personally know two super-heroes… Luke and Alex, big hugs and I love you thiiiiiiiiiiiis much.

If today you find yourself on the giving end of kindness, thank you thank you thank you. Your actions are raising the vibration of the world and is making all the difference. If you find yourself on the receiving end of kindness, me too… how blessed are we, right? ❤ … and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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This Is A Killer

Comparison is the killer of joy.

I was at the pool today, enjoying every moment of my freestyle crawling, the deep breathing, the refreshing waters, that feeling that I am weightless… and then this happened: I took my eyes off my own lane.

I began to compare. Compare myself with the swimmer in the next lane.

I noticed that she was faster than me… and I felt upset, began to berate myself. “Slow-poke! Wind those arms around faster!” It didn’t help. I just could not catch up with her.

My head underwater, I saw more clearly the situation. She was wearing flippers which assisted her pace greatly.

I silently thanked my fellow swimmer for showing up, for speeding along and allowing me to see what’s going on in my heart: insecurity, fear, comparison.

Sigh.

It’s a damn lot, this healing journey.

I am currently owning my “killer of joy” comparing and realizing that there is yet a part of me that is in need of compassion, a hug, and deeper recalibration. Love is missing here, in this little fearful spot within, and I’m spending precious time today loving that Me right into Confidence-n-Peace.

The fastest way to kill something special is to compare it to something else.

We are programmed by religion, our parents, school, gyms, social media, the clothing industry and niggled on by society to keep up with the Joneses, to perform better than the one next door, to always be achieving, trying, pushing, pulling, making it happen. It’s a bunch of bull shit and I’m calling it what it is: competition meant to keep us feeling insecure and inadequate, separated and self-shaming.

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
R. W. Emerson

And I am at the end of the lane with it… from now on, God help me, I will enjoy and be thankful for my lot and hope everyone else in the pool is too.

The truth is THERE IS NO OTHER. I am you; you are me. We are One.

What the heck is there to compare, then? It’s like the fourth rib on the right comparing itself to the left knee cap. It’s ridiculous! We need both and each serves a different and vital capacity. Rib and KneeCap, please see how unique and essential you both are, understand that you are part of the same body, take a deep breath and hug. Let’s all get along… let’s rejoice in each other! ❤

The flower doesn’t think to compare itself to the flower next to it. It just blooms.
Zen Shin

Lisa, LIsa, dear Soul, stop comparing. Stop killing your joy.

Life is the most difficult exam. Many people fail because they try to copy others, not realizing that everyone has a different question on their paper.

This is a biggie for me, to not just know in theory that I am good enough but to feel it, to embody that frequency of adequate-bordering-on-greatness-just-like-everyone-else… it’s deep waters for sure.

Luckily, I like to swim.

If today you find yourself lacking joy, is it possible that you too have been comparing yourself to others on social media, a previous version of yourself, or trying to be good enough for God, mate, friends, children, the swimmer in the next lane? Yeah, me too… I see you and I really do understand. Together, let’s wish the best for each other, for ourselves, for the Collective and the world… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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WHO ARE YOU?

YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM.

No matter what you have been through, you are still here. You may have been challenged, hurt, betrayed, beaten, and discouraged, but nothing has defeated you. You are still here!
S. Maraboli

Whenever I feel bullied, I remember that there must be a victim if there’s a bully. That makes me the victim… and that has not been resonating within me lately. I don’t feel like a victim. Not anymore.

I do have a story of childhood abuse… but that doesn’t have to follow me into today, and I don’t have to identify as a victimized soul. I have another choice. I see that now.

How am I victorious? I AM STILL HERE. I am still standing, albeit some days wobbly and feeling beat up. Then I remember who I am – a spark of God, Divine, Source, Creator, Love – and I plant my feet more firmly and straighten my crown.

You have been delayed but not denied. You are not a victim. You are a victor. You have a history of victory.

Whenever I start to feel bullied, unseen, unheard, misunderstood… I speak aloud to myself, “WarriorQueen, you have risen to the top! You have raised FiveBeautifulSouls the best you could! You have created a whole new story around your relationship with your body! You no longer starve yourself or weight yourself every single damn day! You no longer hide! You no longer crave the attention and affirmation of ‘out there’ because you see yourself, you hear yourself, you understand yourself… Dear Soul, you love yourself! You have forgiven yourself and others! You walk in power and joy! You are wise! You are complete and whole, healing and healed! Today is the best day you could have made it so smile, dance, hug yourself, and allow yourself to be here now in this precious moment. Stay wild!”

When you complain, you make yourself a victim. Leave the situation, change the situation, or accept it. All else is madness.
E. Tolle

This is, by far, the biggest experience I’ve had in this incarnation. Coming out of victim mentality has been the most liberating action I have taken this time around. To know this freedom, I had to know it’s paradox: prison. And it IS prison when you realize that it is YOU yourself who has been holding you back all this time.

Which is empowering, indeed… for then it is YOU yourself who can see that there are no chains, no bars, no prison walls, no keys, no magic words, no jailor. There is only YOU and what you remember about yourself.

No more blaming and shaming. Feel those deep feelings and move the energies. Self-care. Take ownership of your thoughts, your nutrition, your exercise, and how you spend your time and money. Start journaling, sitting under Tree, being quiet. Stop stopping yourself, dear Soul.

You are ROYALTY. Remember! And act like it.

Your move.

If today you find yourself defeated, complaining, sitting in the shallow end of self-pity, let me assure you that I know exactly where you are. Luckily, I also know the way out (which is through, by the way.) Get quiet and hear the Whisper, “now is the time… to heal.” Straighten your crown, dear One, and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Plan B, er C…

Plan B is to make Plan A happen.
Husband

So, yesterday’s post unpacked my goal to fast for 88 hours… and then, LIFE HAPPENED. Much as Husband leans into his mantra of making Plan A happen, I don’t. His approach has been useful on many occasions, no doubt.

We wouldn’t have FurButt if it wasn’t for Husband’s steadfast rulebook of stay-the-course. (That girl chewed up all my pillows and pooped ohmygod pooped everywhere… I was out of my mind, begging Husband to send her furry-butt-n-cute-ears back to the pound… which he wouldn’t… and now I’m thankful. That sweet face greets me every morning, though her deer-poop breath I could do without.)

Begin with the end in mind.
Stephen Covey

Because of Husband’s vision, I am able to be my more spontaneous self. He keeps me grounded, focused, and orderly. We’re two halves of a whole, complementing this journey together.

I wouldn’t have it any other way. ❤

We’re growing together, evolving from a stiff Plan B is Plan A… to introducing Plan C, which is BE HERE NOW.

Cosmic humor, especially about your own predicament, is an important part of your journey.
Ram Dass

FourthSon stopped by unexpectedly and requested my specialty (meatloaf and mashed potatoes, chocolate anything for dessert) to celebrate his 27th… on Sunday, when my fast would still be in full throttle and my tummy on holy-shit empty.

Plan C showed up… that whisper within, that little niggle that urged, “be here now.”

Delighted, I agreed. ❤

Sometimes you have to allow things to fall apart. Open hands, open heart, open mind. Open to the possibilities of what is trying to happen, the bud that is slightly unfolding, the people that God is gathering, the joy that is surfacing, the road less traveled that is beckoning. Oftentimes the best adventures are those unplanned.

Life is what happens to you while you’re making other plans.
John Lennon

While I am all for consistency and effort, goals and accountability, sometimes Plan B must be told to stand down, stop forcing Plan A into a corner and bullying it into forking over its lunch money. Compassion, dear Plan B.

My fast ended after 24 hours and, while I am a list maker extraordinaire and get my kicks from crossing shit off, I am peaceful regarding this choice to veer off the planned path. Life had something else in mind for me and I’m neck deep and splashing around in it, amen.

And, perhaps that 88-hour-turned-24-hour fast helped me to remember that “going with the flow”, allowing myself to change course, being open and curious is the highest vibe. Pushing-pulling-tugging-trying against all odds has its place, for sure, but so does taking each other’s hands and crossing the street less traveled.

Plan A and Plan B are cool fellows, but Plan C has been showing up to the party lately… beckoning us to journey “over there”, on that path overgrown with bushes and brambles.

My life is nowhere near where I thought it’d be… it’s been way riskier, much less safe and sane, predictable and controllable. Chock full to the rim with relationships, ponderings, vulnerability, authenticity, and deep, rich conversations… way more often trekked sans the plan-book.

And this has made all the difference…

If today you find yourself in a different place than you’d planned, hoped, dreamed… me too. We’re not alone on this less taken path, but I have to boast that we look might fine wearing FLEXIBILITY and OPENNESS, dear Soul… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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88 Hours

Periodic fasting can help clear the mind and strengthen the body and spirit.
Ezra Taft Benson

There’s a crazy cool eclipse happening this weekend and my whole being is excited for the energies. Coupled with reconnecting with Sister, I’m feeling pretty darn jazzed.

Sister: I’m doing a 3-day fast.

Me: I’ll join you.

I knew that my body was asking for a fast back in September but was hoping for a partner. I found her! Or she found me. Whichever, I anticipate a weekend filled with amazing skies and an empty belly, renewed mind and revitalized body.

Why 88 hours? Eight speaks to me of persevering through difficulties, success but not without a little struggle and work. Sure, I could have chosen 8 hours or 28 hours… but where’s the edge in that? 😉

Husband is aware of my plans and somewhat supportive. Eating is one of his most favorite to-do’s so not having me there with him in participation has him a little glum. But it’s only 88 hours.

I am currently 22 hours in and definitely feeling the drain. Having fasted before, I am aware that first it hurts and then it hurts a little more and then, ah finally THEN the “high” sets in: clarity of mind, grounding, joy, empowerment.

And having Sister to reach out to and to know that she is right beside me on this cleansing process is immensely helpful. It’s brought us closer already.

Sister: Why do we have to fast for God to hear our prayers?

Me: We don’t. We fast to hear God who speaks all the time.

Less distracted, more aware, open, tender, more introspective, curious, quiet. I can feel the house plants growing, sense the squirrels preparing for the long winter, hear FurButt breathing downstairs on the couch, smell the apples all the way in the kitchen… my body is coming alive, my soul awakening from a long night’s sleep.

Tummy just grumbled. Body speaks. I am listening, compassionate.

I feel slower, more deliberate.

I see myself as a pink rose, closed in a bud for the longest time, just beginning to stir, quivering a petal open, allowing time to bloom.

If today, you find yourself a little out of sorts, perhaps you might consider a short fast… and sit quietly, allowing yourself to BE, to receive, to slow down. I’ll be right there beside you, compassionate and courageous as we journey from bud to blossom… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Sound Therapist & Mind-Body Coach

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Swimming For Life

Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it not to die. And when I’m swimming, sometimes I’m not sure which one it is.
Demetri Martin

I was thirteen before I learned how to swim. Gah, I was terrified of the water though you’d never know it now. I thoroughly enjoy the pool, the lake, the ocean, a creek, a pond, a hot tub.

Okay, so I’m not a fan of COLD water or even cool water, like our college pool boasts… but I’ve learned to accept it and even anticipate its visceral thrill to my body. (Visceral thrill sounds so much nicer than holy-fucking-shit-shock-to-my-body, doesn’t it?) 😉

Last winter, I did not make it to the college even once. It was a slog of a season for me emotionally, mentally, physically. In efforts to not repeat this, I’ve started swimming already, talking myself up and into a quick dip daily.

Yes, it’s chilly. Yes, it’s a challenge to get yourself to the pool. Yes. Take a deep breath, Soul, don that suit and get yer butt poolside NOW… and I love you.
Me to Me, right around noon most days

Habits and changes of mind DO happen. We know the brain has a neuroplasticity and can build new pathways, creating new thoughts, thus manifesting new experiences. Those first few weeks were work and effort and willpower, but lately there’s a flow to the practice, less physical agitation and mental fight, way more peace.

My body is now anticipating that “after” response, when the endorphins are awake and running around in my veins, causing such clarity, a quietness, a gentle calm. And this is a good thing because I have inherited both my dad’s big eyes and my mom’s big heart,.. and both of their struggle with depression and isolation-tendencies.

Swimming helps me wanna stay and participate in life. A short cool dip and my attitude is uplifted. There’ll be no drowning in the deep end of depression for me, thank you.

If today you find yourself out of sorts, maybe even depressed, it’s okay to find someone to talk with. This life isn’t meant to be trekked solo. I’m right here beside you… just beyond the buoys in the next lane… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

Thought Leader & Spiritual Guide

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

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Podcast News!

EnergieGal Podcast – Transformational Conversations – is nearly up and running (again.) I’m so excited!

A couple of years ago, I had the idea to offer a podcast. I had NO clue as to what I was doing and didn’t really even listen to podcasts much. Even now, I rarely find myself out there on social media and, when I do, it’s a few YouTube channels.

Nonetheless, forward into podcast-land I ventured… and found it more challenging than I’d imagined. Thus, it’s been a minute (er, a year) since my last upload.

When I stopped, I was a bit relieved if I’m honest. No more hustling to find guests, no more paying a monthly host fee, no more editing, no more anxiety (I have terrible social media panic attacks.)

Which is why, when I sensed the trajectory of my path head in the way of podcast-land again, I balked. Aw, heck no. Hard no. NO.

No one is more surprised than me when I bravely asked a friend to share a mic and unpack some heart for my first-video-back-to-podcasting. He did. It was amazing, of course, because I love listening to people’s stories and sussing out the deetz… ❤

I’m in the process of searching for a free or very low priced platform… and I’m not worrying about trying to rustle up interviewees. Husband and I will share the mic ourselves if need be. It’s all good and I’m allowing it to unpack.

Life has its surprises and twists and turns, doesn’t it? Ya just gotta stay on the horse and let it carry you on your path. It knows the way. Enjoy the view. Do the work of staying, participating, being curious, courageous… SHOWING UP… and the Universe will do the rest.

How about you? In this season of life, do you find yourself on the horse and letting it carry you? Or are you in front of the horse, pulling-tugging-yanking it in the direction you deem best? Or is the horse dragging you?

And would you like to be a guest on my podcast and unpack some heart? Seriously, your story matters. Your story is OUR story. Your transformation is OUR transformation. We would be honored and jazzed to share the mic with you.

… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Licensed Sound Therapist

Certified Mind-Body Coach

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Celebrating BabySister

Happy 55th birthday to one of my favorite souls.

She is among the most intelligent, articulate, ambitious, and gorgeous souls I’ve ever met. Truly a stunning human being… and she’s mine!

They placed her in my lap when she was a day old. Only three years old myself, but I loved her already… and more and more as each day has unpacked. We’re knit together, karmically entwined, one flame/two souls, yin-yang, two halves of a whole…

She’s extraverted to my introverted; she’s business-minded to my blurred boundaries; she’s grounded to my dreaminess; she’s shake-things-up to my keep-things-the-same; she’s extravagant to my frugal.

We both care deeply, wound easily.

I’m learning to care about others without carrying their burden for them.
BabySister, quoting Joel

We both feel like we’re on a journey, neck-deep in life’s experiences, and thankful to the other for the company. For sure, this particular go-round has had big highs and even bigger lows. Grateful are we to have each other to cry to, hug, seek clarity from, be reminded of the Bigger Picture, and concur that a glass of Prosecco while snuggling on the couch is sometimes the best solution to the problem.

There were years when we spoke rarely. Different seasons of life kept us away from each other. I was raising children; she was building a career.

But when I needed her, she was there. During that scary time when Husband was in hospital for sepsis, she mailed money so I could take a week off work to be with him. Later, she mailed us plane tickets to a resort in SoCal, joining us to celebrate Husband’s survival. She rolled out the red carpet to us. We were the center of her attention as she drove us around in a convertible. Because living is hard some days but it can also be just so much fun.

She has this way of celebrating people and occasions, holding space in a way that ya believe that maybe you’re God (or at least royalty.) I know she makes me feel like I’m the most special soul on the whole earth. She holds space for my most introspective personality. “I don’t quite understand what you’re saying, but I am thankful to be here with you as you unpack your heart.” Yeah, she’s that groovy.

She listens the way I talk, all metaphors and similes, parables and quotes. 🙂

She’s funny; she’s curious; she’s honest. An excellent cook, a passionate mother to Augustine, and an avid reader… she’s a runner, great at tennis, loves to hike. She’s determined to suck the marrow of this life, enjoy, embrace, experience! And to bring you all right with her!!! 🙂

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anais Nin

Like me, she’s on her journey in regards to the messiness of life and Love and relationships and trying to figure all this shit out. It’s a damn lot.

I’m not sure I whispered anything into her one-day-old ears as I cradled her all those years ago, but had I known the depths-widths-height of The Adventure called this-time-around, I may have pulled her tiny bundled body just a little closer and promised her… we make it. We survive. We thrive and evolve and laugh and cry. We get angry and then forgive. Some things never make sense but we move on anyway. And then grow not just in spite of it all but because of it all. And life is a masterpiece and tragic and wonderful.

And perhaps, dear BabySister, just perhaps… the best IS yet to come. (I love you. <3)

If today you find yourself nostalgic and grateful, me too. I think it’s a good look for us, I really do… enjoy. And here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Licensed Sound Therapist

Certified Mind-Body Coach

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Easy As Pie (uhm, kinda)

Expect to have hope rekindled. The dry seasons in life do not last. The spring rains will come again.
Sarah Ban Breathnach

Truth be known, it’s been rough. How’s it been for you? My dark night of the soul segued into a dark night of the spirit, thank you very much Higher Self for this punch in the face.

I really AM grateful… for this punch in the face… this wake-up, stand-down, stay-still season in my life. Which has lasted nearly four years. Yep, grateful. 😉

While hope dwindled, perhaps that’s okay. Maybe it’s normal and even darn acceptable to feel tired, confused, frustrated, even more introverted than usual, did I mention exhausted? It’s a reasonable response to a difficult period of time in life.

So, today I’m even more grateful than ever because… I have been feeling a smidge more alive, less achy. There has been some clarity, renewed desire, and I’m dreaming again. 🙂

And apples.

Mother-in-law dropped off a load of apples with which I have created three pies, one for tonight and two in the freezer. I had the desire to peel, core, slice, spice, and place all those beauties into pie plates and oven and ohmygod the house smells amaaaaaziiiiing.

Why do some-most-all of us walk through dark nights? Probably too soon to sit with that for me yet… but I do think that it’s part of the plan, the awakening, the journey of remembering who we are; it’s an integral experience that gives opportunity for some things to die and other things to live more loudly, vibrantly, boldly. The dark night strips us, right down to the nubs. Naked. Raw. Shaking. Shaken.

The purpose of the dark night of the soul is to make us bigger, feel more at home, expanded, stronger—and able to give more light to the world.
Yusim

More light to the world… hmmm… well, if this is the case for me, it’s been worth it. Because I love the world, I love humanity, I love nature and animals, I love our plan to forget who we are as Godness and then bump into each other and remember Ourselves way over here on Earth.

I’m still digesting this dark night. It’s a damn lot.

But today, there are apples. And pies. Explanations and plans, ponderings and dreams can wait while this Remembering Soul shines…. with a mouthful of fruit.

If today you find yourself wandering through your dark night of the soul or if your spirit feels a little off-kilter, I see you. I completely understand. Pie might help… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Licensed Sound Therapist

Certified Mind-Body Coach

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Bus Stop Art

Creativity takes courage.
Henri Matisse

A few years ago, Daughter was offered the job of a lifetime. No, it doesn’t make a ton of money nor does it carry with it a load of fame. But the people she has met, the friendships she has made, the expansion of soul from a myriad of off-the-beaten-path experiences has been priceless. Life-changing!

And I’m talking priceless and life-changing for ME, and likely her as well.

Springville Center for the Arts (SCA) is a rural multi-arts center established as a grassroots collaborative venture between a long-standing community theater group and a network of fine artists in 1998.

She is an integral part of this collaberation of artists, spearheaded by Seth (who I just refer to as TallManWhoAlwaysWearBlack.) His vision and passion melt together and create wild, risky space for artists and aficionados alike.

Daughter is the artist; I am the fan.

Among so many great works that we’ve been privileged to attend, bootleg.soiree with The Lowlies was one of the very best. (Full disclosure: I say that about every single gathering.) But it’s absolutely true. The passion and artistry, creativity and no-holds-barred, outside-of-the-box offerings are nothing short of genuis.

Priceless and life-changing!

Delevan, New York is a tiny place with a big energy. Last night, hundreds of us gathered to hear the band, peruse the old building which has housed Kendor Music since 1953, and appreciate the unique installations:

“vending machine” that offered art-by-order with cheekiness (one of my faves!)
“word play” – a make-your-own-sentence poetry via velcro
“table tree” with invitations to copy-by-box art
lanterns, light table, fibert art, peephole
“wheatpastes” in which you peeled an outer picture to reveal the picture underneath
“bus stop” (pictures above) which was super eerie but way cool

The coordination of the evening and the love and passion of every single volunteer was beyond Beyond. The vibes were so big, the fun so high, the cookies so yummy. 😉

There’s something magical, mystical that happens when we gather together… and more so when the camaraderie includes a community of artists sharing their creativity and passion. There is healing, connection, laughter, transformation that happens in the presence of such Love, Light, and Life as this.

Priceless and life-changing!

Public art is not an extra. It is a necessary part of a thriving community. Art IS community.

Thank you to Seth, Alisia, Max, The Lowlies, and all the many, many other helpers and visionaries here, there, and everywhere. You are courageous indeed.

All together, we are making life more interesting, buildings more beautiful, souls more alive, hearts afire; we are broadening horizons, spanning generations, crossing lines, opening eyes; we are losing ourselves in artistry and finding ourselves in each other; we are creating a kinder world.

Priceless and life-changing!

If today, you find yourself out of sorts, consider going to a museum, a concert, reading a book, buying a paint-by-number kit, dancing, or getting out your high school instrument and seeing what you remember… in a world where the logical mind is lauded, let us allow the creative mind to come on out and play… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Licensed Sound Therapist

Certified Mind-Body Coach

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So Long, Summer 2023

It’s part procrastination, part I-don’t-wanna-see-summer-end, and part this-is-gonna-be-coooooold that I wait til October to close the pool.
Husband, shivering

Well, it’s officially the end of summer here at our house as Husband puts the finishing touches on closing the pool. He seldom gets to this task in September, though we’ve never gotten into November with an open pool.

I don’t help.

It’s just too damn cold. Yes, I do pull the cover on once he’s gotten the barrels in place, strings tied, and bricks prepared. But do I get IN the pool? Uhm, hard no. He’s a good sport about it, thank God.

Kinda like cleaning up vomit when the kids were yet wee… this was my thing and I never made him feel badly about leaving it to me. We know our capacities for puke and so-cold-could-cause-bodily-harm.

There are many who tout the benefits of ice baths. I am not one of them. Okay, there are benefits, but… I am not one of them reaping the benefits.

No.

We joke and wonder how long it’ll be before his man-bits find their way back down. (It’s usually some time in November, if you’re wondering.) 😉

It was a good summer. Busier than I’d preferred, some surprise events that caused me to slip off the rails a bit, but we’re back on and the engine is at a purr… all in all, busy but productive. We’ve already said that next summer can be a bit more chill, er, quiet.

In the meantime, I’ll be swimming over at the college facility. It’s actually a tepid dip. Almost darn chilly. I’m acclimating to the cold, albeit slowly. I’m not promising anything b-u-u-u-t, next summer, I may be able to join him in closing the pool.

And I won’t even insist he share in the vomit-cleaning. 😉

If today you find yourself ending one thing and looking ahead to the next, me too… change is never easy for most of us so if you’re a bit out of sorts, I see you. Here beside you. “Chilled but hopeful” is a good look on us, I’d say… and here’s a hug.

Edge-y, joyful, pondering…

Lisa

EnergieGal Holistic Wellness

Licensed Sound Therapist

Certified Mind-Body Coach